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The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Of The Pixel Project’s Best Interview Articles

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Blogging is one of the major pillars of our social media-driven awareness-raising and educational work. More than any other social media platforms that we use, blogging empowers us to present in-depth articles, op-eds, and interviews that go beyond the soundbites. As we grew as an anti-VAW organisation, we have gradually focused our blogging efforts on interviews to help activists, allies, and survivors tell their stories and share their ideas with others first-hand.

In 2018, we marched on with our annual interview-format blogging campaigns:

  • Our long-running monthly Inspirational Interview series highlighting the excellent but little-known work of many anti-VAW activists and organisations from around the world
  • Our 4th annual Survivors Stories series which is a safe, structured platform for survivors of all forms of VAW to share their experiences as well as encouragement and ideas for women who are still facing the violence.
  • Our 5th 30 For 30 Father’s Day series which is a platform for dads worldwide to speak out about sexism, misogyny, and violence against women in the gaming community and industry.

Together, these interviews form an inspirational tapestry of ideas, stories, and calls-to-action from remarkable individuals, communities, and allies that are at the front lines of bringing the change that is so desperately needed to end VAW.

If you have missed any of our blog interview campaigns this year or are new to The Pixel Project’s work, this selection of this year’s 16 best Pixel Project blog interview articles of 2018 will be a great starting point. We hope that the stories we shared motivate you to join the effort to end VAW.

It’s time to stop violence against women. Together.

Written and compiled by Regina Yau. Introduction by Regina Yau.

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Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #1: Inspirational Interview – Dr Angela Jay, Australia

Dr Angela Jay has a master’s degree in reproductive medicine and is an advocate for White Ribbon Australia, a campaign battling violence against women. Angela is also a personal survivor of violence against women, escaping attempted murder at the hands of a man she briefly dated. She has had the honour of speaking at several events addressing domestic violence, including the 2017 White Ribbon Breakfast in Australia’s Parliament, engaging the nation’s leaders about the significance of VAW in the Australian community. When speaking to The Pixel Project about the role of healthcare providers such as doctors in tackling VAW, she said: “Our role to support victims and survivors of VAW extends well beyond simply providing medical treatment. When faced with a disclosure of violence or abuse, it is vital to respond appropriately and with an empathetic, non-judgmental attitude. […] I believe it is also a doctor’s duty to consider safety planning and assist with referrals to police, specialised domestic violence services, legal aid, and other support agencies when accepted. In some circumstances, particularly when children are involved, health professionals may be obligated by local mandatory reporting requirements to involve Community Services to help ensure safety and well-being.

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #2: 30 For 30 Father’s Day Interview – Christopher Golden, United States of America

Christopher Golden and his wife Connie are the parents of Nicholas (24), Daniel (22), and Lily (15), all of whom are profoundly unimpressed with their New York Times bestselling, Bram Stoker Award-winning dad, whose novels include Ararat, Snowblind, Dead Ringers, Of Saints and Shadows, Strangewood and many others. He is also an editor, screenwriter, speaker, teacher, comic book writer and podcaster, among many other things. When talking about the role of dads in helping to stop VAW, he said: “We must lead by example. We must speak in the face of injustice. Elevate and amplify the voices of women instead of speaking for them. Show boys and young men that you respect a woman’s right to be her own champion. Listen to her, and make sure they do as well. Define her by her ideas and accomplishments and hopes and quirks, not by her hair or her weight or her shape. Draw attention to the way in which society commodifies women’s appearance and how detrimental that is to individual and national psychology. Don’t stay silent when others spout ignorance. Redefine manhood, and let the women in your life create their own definition of what it means to be a woman.” Christopher is also a Read For Pixels author and has spoken more extensively about the role of men and boys in stopping VAW via his Read For Pixels Google Hangout.

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #3: 30 For 30 Father’s Day Interview – Dan Wells, United States of America

New York Times bestselling author Dan Wells is best known for his horror series I Am Not a Serial Killer, of which the first book is now an award-winning movie through IFC Midnight. His other novels include The Hollow City, Extreme Makeover, and two science fiction series: Partials and Mirador. He co-hosts the Hugo-winning podcast for aspiring writers called Writing Excuses. He has written for television and the stage and he writes short fiction and game fiction. Dan lives in northern Utah with his wife, six children, and more than 400 board games. When talking about the role of dads in helping to stop VAW, he said: “The first thing we do is to always model good behavior. My sons have never seen me mistreat, yell at, strike or otherwise abuse my wife or my daughters, and they never will. They HAVE seen me love them, respect them and treat them like equal partners in our family and our lives.” Dan is also a Read For Pixels author and has spoken more extensively about the role of men and boys in stopping VAW via his Read For Pixels Google Hangout.

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #4: Read For Pixels Interview – Faith Hunter, United States of America

New York Times bestselling author Faith Hunter writes three series: the Jane Yellowrock series, dark urban fantasy novels featuring Jane, a Cherokee Skinwalker; the Rogue Mage novels, a dark, urban fantasy/post apocalyptic series and role playing game featuring Thorn St. Croix; and the Soulwood series featuring Nell Nicholson Ingram. During her Read For Pixels interview, Faith said: “I worked in a hospital lab for 40 years. I was part of the evidence collection for rape victims. It was horrible. Utterly horrible, what victims have to go through, even after an assault. Throughout my entire life, I’ve seen abusive relationships, and not just abusive men, but abusive women too. It’s a human problem, a victim problem, not just a women’s problem. That said, I have female writer friends who have suffered abuse and who have been dragged through the dirt, vilified, threatened, and abused again when they speak up against their accusers in the publishing arena. It’s my job as a human being to stand with them when they name names and call the guilty accountable. It’s all our jobs. We have to get off our asses and fight to be human. Together.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #5: Read For Pixels Interview – Ian Whates, United Kingdom

Ian Whates is the author of seven novels, the co-author of two more, and editor of thirty-odd anthologies. Seventy of his short stories have appeared in various venues and his work has been shortlisted for the Philip K Dick Award and twice for the BSFA Awards. In 2006, Ian founded award-winning independent publisher NewCon Press by accident. In his Read For Pixels interview, he talked about what publishers can do to stop VAW, saying: “Publishers, particularly when they are as niche as my own, have very limited influence on the world, but that’s not the same as having no influence. There is an onus on us to behave responsibly in selecting what we publish; by ensuring that unacceptable behaviour is either omitted entirely or shown to be unacceptable and portrayed in a light that vilifies both the act and those who resort to it, we can make a difference. A very small difference perhaps – a drop in the ocean – but the cumulative effect of enough drops over time can contribute to change.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #6: Inspirational Interview – Jaf Shah, United Kingdom

Jaf Shah is the executive director of Acid Survivors Trust International. He started as a programme manager working on projects in South Africa for a charity whose patrons included Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu. He has implemented multiple British government- and UN-supported projects. He was an award panelist for Stars Foundation Impact Awards, which awards grants to not-for-profits that evidence impact in delivering protection and health of children in low-income countries. When speaking about what can be done to end VAW, he said: “I believe to bring about an end to violence against women requires a major change in attitudes and behavior across all levels of society, at an individual, family and community level. However we have a responsibility to challenge government and states to take a leading role in its obligation to end violence against women. This means holding governments to account by passing laws, enforcing laws and running wide scale educational programmes from an early age address violence against women.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #7: 30 For 30 Father’s Day Interview – Jim C. Hines, United States of America

Jim C. Hines is an author and stay-at-home dad to his 12-year-old son and 17-year-old daughter. His published science fiction and fantasy books include the Goblin trilogy, the Princess series, the Magic ex Libris books, and his new novel Terminal Alliance, the first in a trilogy about space janitors. In his interview with The Pixel Project, he said: “I’ve tried to teach both of my children about consent in various ways over the years. Letting them know they have the right to say no, even to things like being tickled or hugged or photographed. Emphasising that they have to respect when other people say no as well.  In terms of helping the next generation become aware of and step up to try to stop violence against women, I feel like my job is to educate them about the problem. Particularly for guys, it’s so easy to close our eyes and pretend the problem doesn’t exist.” Jim is also a Read For Pixels author and has spoken more extensively about the role of men and boys in stopping VAW via his Read For Pixels Google Hangout.

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #8: Survivor Stories Interview – Julie Owens, United States of America

After surviving domestic violence, Julie Owens left her work in special education to develop domestic violence hospital trainings, an ER crisis team, and a transitional shelter. She later directed domestic violence trauma research at the National Center for PTSD, coordinated domestic violence efforts in a mental health system, counseled substance using victims, and oversaw victim service agencies. When talking about how communities can end VAW, she said: “We need a major paradigm shift in the world, away from domination and coercive control of women by men, to full gender equality and true partnership. Without this, the abuse of women will never stop. We will just be putting Band-Aids on the wounds – treating the symptoms, not getting at the root of the problem, which is the historical domination of women by men. It took me years to understand this, but this is what underpins all violence against women. Achieving gender equality and true partnership will free both women and men, and children, to live fully and freely in peace. It will bring healing to the world and to our planet.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #9: Survivor Stories Interview – Leah Zeiger, United States of America

Leah Zeiger is a dancer, activist, writer, and survivor. She founded The Sunflower Project, an organisation that uses dance and other forms of art to help heal survivors of gender based violence. She is the co-director of the documentary Untold – a film about her experience with abuse. In her interview with us, she talks about the importance of consent and sex education as part of eradicating rape culture: “We need sex education, we need relationship education, we need parents to explicitly tell their children what rape is and explain the nuances of consent. We need to stop pretending like we aren’t hurting our children by declining them knowledge. We need to own up to the reality that our children will face, and then we need to actually prepare them for it.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #10: Inspirational Interview – Naomi Mwaura, Kenya

Naomi Mwaura, the founder of Kenya’s Flone Initiative which focuses on addressing violence against women in Kenya including street harassment and workplace harassment in the public transportation industry. She is among seven African women to be named as “BBC 100 Inspirational and Influential Women” in 2017. When speaking about how men and boys can help stop VAW, she said: “We can help men and boys do so by supporting them in identifying when violence against women and girls is being perpetrated and actively responding by strongly condemning perpetrators of violence. An operator who previously incited others against young women he thought were “indecent” now mobilises other male operators to attend the Usalama wa Uma training, and educates others on the need to respect female clients.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #11: Inspirational Interview – Noorjahan Akbar, Afghanistan

Noorjahan Akbar is an outspoken women right’s advocate and author from Afghanistan. She has worked with several Afghan and global organisations focusing on women’s empowerment and ending gender-based violence and led nation-wide campaigns and protests in defense of human rights. She currently runs Free Women Writers, a collective of activists and writers in Afghanistan and the diaspora advocating for gender equality and social justice. Speaking about how individuals and communities worldwide can support efforts to end VAW, she suggested that the general public “amplify the voices of survivors and donate to organisations that work on this issue. Women’s rights organisations are still among the least funded organisations in the world. This often leads to women’s organisations competing over little resources instead of working together to fight challenges. Let’s work together to change this. Working for women’s rights is dangerous, tiring, and long term. We can’t expect activists to continue to put their mental health and well-being and their livelihoods on the line in order for women to have more rights. If you can donate 5 dollars do it. Every small donation goes a long way because most women’s rights organisations are frugal in resources. Do your research and support organisations that have brought about change in your local community as well as around the world.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #12: 30 For 30 Father’s Day Interview – Paul Tremblay, United States of America  

Paul Tremblay has won the Bram Stoker, British Fantasy, and Massachusetts Book awards and is the author of The Cabin at the End of the World, Disappearance at Devil’s Rock, A Head Full of Ghosts, and The Little Sleep. He is currently a member of the board of directors of the Shirley Jackson Awards, and his essays and short fiction have appeared in the Los Angeles Times, Entertainment Weekly.com, and numerous “year’s best” anthologies. When speaking about dads stopping VAW, he said: “I have talks with my son about women and dating, and empathy for others in general. Every father-son relationship is different and there’s always going to be some level of discomfort when talking about difficult subjects, but (and I’m saying this here to remind myself) you should push through that discomfort and make sure there’s an ongoing dialogue. I listen to what he has to say in response while hopefully teaching him to listen to the women in (and out) of his life.” Paul is also a Read For Pixels author and has spoken more extensively about the role of men and boys in stopping VAW via his Read For Pixels Google Hangout.

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #13: Inspirational Interview, Susan Jack, Scotland

Susan Jack trained as a nurse at The Western Infirmary and then completed a degree in history and social policy at the University of Glasgow. Following a year of work in the social policy department, Susan took up her post as a training & development worker with Glasgow Women’s Aid in 2002 where she has been working to stop VAW until today. When speaking about the role of men and boys in stopping VAW, she said: “We really need to hear their voices speaking out against violence. Most men are not abusers and we need to hear from them. Language and attitudes feed into violence against women, so jokes about rape and ‘banter’ have serious consequences. Boys and men should feel able to call out their peers on such behaviour and language. This isn’t necessarily easy, but would have a positive impact.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #14: Inspirational Interview – Suzanne Dubus, United States of America

Suzanne C. Dubus joined the Jeanne Geiger Crisis Center in 1995 and has served as its CEO since 1998. A survivor of domestic violence, she understands what it means to be inside an abusive relationship. That perspective and her innovative vision have driven her to revolutionise the paradigm of domestic violence (DV) work on a national scale. During her interview with The Pixel Project, she talked about the ways boys and men can help to end VAW, saying: “Boys and men have the opportunity to help in many ways! The first is to educate themselves on the issue of male privilege, patriarchy and sexism and do their own work about defining what kind of man they want to be. Second, speak out against abuse when you see it and hear it. Third, partner with the women and girls and organisations already doing this work and ask what is needed.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #15: Survivor Stories Interview – Traci Powell, United States of America

Traci Powell is a nurse practitioner who has cared for critically ill newborns for over 20 years. As a survivor of child sexual abuse, she never told anyone what happened to her until she began her recovery journey in 2014. Understanding the importance of survivor connection in healing, Traci founded Voices in the Silence to empower survivors of sexual abuse to transform and break free from the past through education and peer support. When talking about how society can stop VAW, she said: “The sad truth is this issue is not going to go away for a very long time, if ever. Perpetrators live among us. We need to teach our daughters about appropriate touch and make sure they know it is safe to tell, even if someone tells them not to. We need to teach our sons to be respectful of women. We need to teach parents that paedophiles don’t come in monster costumes and the signs of grooming by a perpetrator. Most of them come in the form of a friendly coach, teacher, neighbour, uncle or other close relationship. We need to teach our young women how to stay safe.”

 

Pixel Project Blog Interview Selection #16: Inspirational Interview – Urmilla Pullat, India

Urmilla Pullat is a lawyer and researcher who runs the India desk for the Asian Human Rights Commission (Hong Kong). Currently seconded to India, she works on rule of law and human rights issues intersecting with criminal justice reform, with a focus on police torture and custodial violence. Urmilla runs the website project How Revealing, an online repository of experiences of gender-based violence, and is working to contribute toward changing the narrative surrounding gender justice and sexual assault, mainly in India. When talking about her anti-VAW activism, Urmilla said: “The current solution to gender disparity and gender-based violence is significantly limited because it is seen as a women’s issue. The main challenge is to reframe it, to contribute towards changing the narrative to make it everyone’s issue. […] What I have learnt is that it is important to keep running campaigns around specific areas of sexual violence, to nudge people into knowing its relevance for them, and that constant media engagement is necessary and crucial to keep normalising the act of disclosure and seeking support.”

 

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Photo Credits:

  1. Dr Angela Jay – Courtesy of RANZCOG
  2. Christopher Golden – Courtesy of Christopher Golden
  3. Dan Wells – Courtesy of Dan Wells
  4. Faith Hunter – Courtesy of Faith Hunter
  5. Ian Whates – Courtesy of Ian Whates
  6. Jaf Shah – Courtesy of Acid Survivors Trust International
  7. Jim C. Hines – Courtesy of Jim C. Hines
  8. Julie Owens – Courtesy of Julie Owens
  9. Leah Zeigler – Courtesy of Leah Zeigler
  10. Naomi Mwaura – Courtesy of the Flone Initiative
  11. Noorjahan Akbar – Courtesy of Free Women Writers
  12. Paul Tremblay – Courtesy of Paul Tremblay
  13. Susan Jack – Courtesy of Glasgow Women’s Aid
  14. Suzanne Dubus – Courtesy of the Jeanne Geiger Crisis Center
  15. Traci Powell – Courtesy of Traci Powell
  16. Urmilla Pullat – Courtesy of Urmilla Pullat

 

The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Striking Campaigns for the Cause to End Violence Against Women

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Every year, we at The Pixel Project come across a wide variety of innovative and powerful campaigns tackling Violence Against Women (VAW) by our fellow activists and non-profits from around the globe, and 2018 is no exception. While some campaigns worked to shine a light on violence against the most marginalised groups of women, others took forward the Me Too movement in their own unique way.

We acknowledge that anti-VAW campaigners put themselves in perilous situations to advocate for the safety of others and we are immeasurably grateful for their bravery. From women marching the streets to women combating harassment online, each and every action, large or small, counts.

So today, in honour of all VAW activists, non-profits and grassroots groups who toil in such thankless situations to bring about positive change to the lives of women and girls facing violence, we present 16 of the most striking campaigns/programmes we have come across in the last year of our work.

What these campaigns have in common are:

  • The built-in “water-cooler” factor that gets the community buzzing about the campaign and, by extension, the issue of VAW.
  • A good sense of what works in and for the culture and community where the activist/nonprofit/grassroots group is trying to effect change.

We hope that these campaigns and initiatives inspire you to take action and get on board the cause to end VAW.

It’s time to stop violence against women. Together.

Introduction by Regina Yau. Written and compiled by Rubina Singh

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Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #1: #Abaya_Insideout – Saudi Arabia

Women in Saudi Arabia have been protesting against the fact that they are expected to wear an abaya and hijab in public. After the relaxation of driving rules a while ago, women were campaigning for reform of the forceful dress code as well. A recent Twitter campaign using the hashtag “#Abaya_Insideout” became a form of peaceful protest against this regulation where women are photographing themselves wearing inside out abayas.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #2: All-Women Cycle Rallies – Pakistan

In an effort to protest against street harassment and exercise their right to occupy public spaces, some women in Pakistan carried out women-only cycle rallies across various cities in the country. “Our strategy is simply to be visible in public spaces,” said Meher Bano of Girls at Dhabas, a feminist group that organised the races after a woman from Lahore was pushed off her bicycle by a group of men last year for not responding to catcalls. 

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #3: Be Frank – The Netherlands

Two Dutch filmmakers have created a video campaign highlighting the high instances of VAW in mainstream pornography. Damayanti Dipayana and Camilla Borel-Rinkes shared a summary of a sexual encounter and asked men if it was a porn scene or a personal story about sexual assault. In their film, Be Frank, they showthe how much of the porn available online showcases aggression and violence towards women and how men learn to normalise abusive experiences through these films.

 Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #4: Campaign against Hidden Camera Pornography – South Korea

Many women are unknowingly filmed in public spaces in South Korea by hidden or spy cameras.Porn films showcase footage of women on toilets, on escalators or stairs, hotel rooms and various other seemingly private spaces. Tired of living in constant fear of being filmed, more than 20,000 women came together in Seoul to protest against this practice and urge the government to take stringent action.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #5: Campaign to end ‘sexual cleansing’ of widows – Kenya

A custom in Kenya and some other African nations believes that widows are impure and they must be cleansed after their husbands’ death. The ‘cleansing’ involves having sex with a male relative or stranger among other humiliating practices such as shaving the widow’s head and burning her clothes. Widow abuse is hardly talked about but organisations such as the Rona Foundation are working to change that with many international agencies covering their struggles.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #6: Counting Dead Women – Australia

Counting Dead Women is an initiative of the organisation Destroy the Joint which aims to research, record and publish every reported incident of a woman’s death due to VAW. Through this campaign, they are bringing many cases of femicide to light in Australia as well as providing helpful resources to women who are facing VAW. As of November 2018, they have recorded 62 women’s deaths as being a direct cause of VAW.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #7: I Will End FGM – Across Africa

The Girl Generation along with many other organisations and youth groups from various African nations initiated a campaign against FGM across the continent. Using the hashtags “#EndFGM” and “#IHaveSpoken”, the campaign hopes to spark a million conversations around FGM to break the silence about this heinous practice.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #8: Let Her Work – Brazil

Using the hashtag “#LetHerWork” or “#DeixaElaTrabalhar”, Brazilian sports journalists ran a campaign to bring attention to the sexual harassment and abuse they deal with during work. The campaign demands respect and a harassment-free work experience for women sports journalists.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #9: List of Known Sexual Harassers in Academia – United States of America

Julie Libarkin, a professor at Michigan State University, has compiled a list of more than 700 cases of sexual misconduct in academia. Talking about why she started the database, Libarking said, “I think one of the biggest problems with sexual misconduct is that there’s no way to know if anyone experienced that before you…There’s really no way to find out this information. I want people to be able to look at these names”.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #10: Me Too India – India

What started last year with Raya Sarkar’s list of sexual harassment accused became an even bigger movement across India this year. Stories have emerged from the worlds of film, journalism, academics, politics, advertising, design, art and many others. The impact of these stories has led to some positive change where many influential men accused of sexual harassment have stepped down from their professional posts, including former Minister of State for External Affairs M J Akbar.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #11: #Mitu – China

Despite strict internet censorship, women in China led their own version of the Me Too movement. Using the hashtag “#Mitu” which means ‘rice bunny’ and “#Woyeshi”, which means ‘me too’, Chinese women shared their stories about VAW without garnering the wrath of the censors. The stories have already managed to bring about some change with new policies being introduced to curb sexual harassment in university campuses.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #12: The Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women Database – Canada and United States of America

Annita Lucchesi, a descendant of the Cheyenne Tribe, has started a database that collates information about missing and murdered indigenous girls, women and two spirit people in Canada and the USA from 1900 to the present. Talking about the need for such a database, Lucchesi said, “I found that there really wasn’t any comprehensive information on this issue. And there was no number that we could all agree on. There was no research bringing together both countries or doing a longer historical look. There were lists online and projects that had been put together, but none of them matched.”

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #13: The Not-So-Beautiful Game – United Kingdom

In a hard-hitting campaign, UK’s National Centre of Domestic Violence wanted to highlight the increase in incidents of domestic violence during sporting events. Their reports show that domestic violence increases irrespective of whether England wins or loses. There is a 38% increase in domestic violence reports when England loses a match and a 26% increase when England wins or draws. Their campaign depicted the flags of countries, such as England, Japan and Switzerland, on the faces of battered women, and released the visuals on the day of the country’s match during the World Cup.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #14: This is Not Consent – Ireland

In the rape trial of a 27-year-old man in Ireland, the 17-year-old victim’s lacy underwear was cited as proof of consent  , leading to the acquittal of the accused. Protests erupted across the nation using the hashtag “#Thisisnotconsent”, where women brought thongs and lacy undergarments to the streets and social media to protest against persistent victim blaming in cases of VAW. Even the Irish MP Ruth Coppinger joined the protests and brought a thong to Parliament.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #15: Warning systems in airport toilets to curb FGM – United Kingdom

To provide support to possible victims of forced marriages, female genital mutilation (FGM), child sexual abuse, and other forms of VAW, the Birmingham Airport authorities in the UK have installed a colour coded sticker system in women’s toilet cubicles. Women who enter the cubicle can call the number mentioned on the sticker and get help. The colour of the sticker in each cubicle is different, allowing authorities to identify the correct cubicle and offer support.

Striking Anti-VAW Campaign #16: Women’s Day Strike – Spain

More than 5 million women gathered to protest against gender inequality, discrimination, and VAW on International Women’s Day 2018 in Spain. The protest involved a 24-hour strike where women abstained from doing any work under the slogan, “If we stop, the world stops”. Many prominent women supported the strike, including the Mayors of Madrid and Barcelona.

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All pictures used are Creative Commons images (from top to bottom):

The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Films About Violence Against Women

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In this age of Netflix, YouTube, and Vimeo, the visual mediums of film and television are particularly effective mediums for teaching and learning. This is why, for the past 6 years, The Pixel Project has been publishing lists of powerful films, documentaries and television shows that seek to inform and educate the public about the worldwide scourge of violence against women, its various forms, and what everyone can do to stop and prevent it.

This is the 7th year that The Pixel Project has curated a selection of powerful and thought-provoking films, documentaries and television shows that depict violence against women and girls (VAWG) in its various forms. This year, we have a more diverse selection than usual in two ways:

  • Geographically, our 2018 selection spans Asia, Europe and the Americas, depicting women and girls from different walks of life, dealing with different situations, but all with one thing in common – the violence they have or are experiencing in their lives.
  • Format-wise, we have included not just powerful documentaries but also recommendations for TV series, specific TV episodes, and also feature films that tackle the issue of VAW. Even if they are fictional, stories matter because they shape our culture and mindsets.

We hope that these films will inspire you to learn more about the various forms of violence against women and become a catalyst for change in your own communities. To learn more about each documentary, film, or TV series, click on the hyperlinked title of each selection.

Introduction by Anushia Kandasivam and Regina Yau. Written and compiled by Anushia Kandasivam with additional selections by Regina Yau.

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Selection Number 1: A Safe Distance (1986)

This short documentary looks at some innovative approaches to providing services and accommodation to battered women in rural, northern and Native Canadian communities. Though an old film, it is still a rare look at domestic violence in these communities. The film also focuses on a safe house within a Native community Reserve that is built and run by women to stand as a reminder that the Reserve will not tolerate violence against women.

A Safe Distance, Tina Horne, provided by the National Film Board of Canada

Selection Number 2: Audrie & Daisy (2016)

“The words of our enemies aren’t as awful as the silence of our friends.” This American documentary, release on Netflix in 2016, is about the rape of two underage girls in two different towns at two different times, and the common ripple effect on families, friends, schools and communities when they each find out that their sexual assaults have been caught on camera. Besides being a story of sexual assault, this film takes a hard look at American teenagers and their communities in the world of social media bullying.

Selection Number 3: Big Little Lies (2017- )

A darkly comedic drama series about three emotionally troubled women who become embroiled in a murder investigation, this series also touches on violence in the home between parents and at school between children. It explores how children learn or are taught to see threatening behaviour as a prank or all in good fun and how even the most violent behaviour can seem innocuous if it is treated as normal.

Selection Number 4: Call the Midwife (2012 – )

An unexpectedly feminist and socially conscious BBC period drama, Call the Midwife is about a group of nurse midwives working in London in the late 1950s and early 1960s. Now in its 7th season, its episodes have dealt with issues of domestic violence, unwanted pregnancies, poverty, prostitution, sexual violence and even female genital mutilation.

Selection Number 5: Greenshaw’s Folly – Agatha Christie’s Marple, Season 6, Episode 2 (2013)

The UK’s ITV network has long been renowned for their pitch perfect adaptations of Agatha Christie’s seminal detective series into multiple seasons comprising well-produced movie-length episodes. In this adaptation of Greenshaw’s Folly, one of the Miss Marple mysteries, the producers updated the storyline to include domestic violence – specifically showing Miss Marple helping a young woman and her son flee their abusive husband and father. This gets intertwined with the central mystery in various ways but the most gratifying outcome of all is that the abuser eventually gets nabbed when he attempts to abduct his wife and son.

Selection Number 6: Finding Home (2014)

A documentary about human trafficking, this film follows three young Cambodian women who were trafficked when they were in their early teens, and now live in a safe house, telling their unique stories. It shows the complexities and difficulties of learning how to deal with horrific abuse and the struggle girls and young women in conservative societies face in overcoming their trauma and building a future for themselves.

Finding Home Trailer from Flying Treasure on Vimeo.

Selection Number 7: I Can Speak (2017)

A South Korean comedy-drama film about an elderly woman who seems constantly dissatisfied with the world around her and the unlikely friendship she strikes with a young man who teaches her English. This takes an unexpected twist when her teacher finds out the real reason she wants to learn English. This film is also an exploration and discussion of the topic of Korean ‘comfort women’ during World War II, and the importance of speaking and telling your story of survival.

Selection Number 8: I, Tonya (2017)

A biographical film about Olympian figure skater Tonya Harding, based on extensive research and interviews with Harding herself, her mother, ex-husband and others, this film depicts Harding’s life from the time she was a child, her difficult journey to the Olympics, her controversial involvement in the shocking physical attack on rival figure skater Nancy Kerrigan, and the aftermath of that life-changing incident. The film sheds stark light on Harding’s life behind-the-scenes and the cycles of abuse she experienced – an abusive mother leads her to an abusive husband – and subtly explores how prevalent abuse can shape the world-view of anyone, even a celebrated athlete.

Selection Number 9: Namrata (2009)

In this very short documentary – only 9 minutes – Namrata Gill tells the story of how as a very young woman, she married a man and moved to Canada, and after 6 years finds the courage to leave her abusive husband and start a surprising new career. Even in this short film, the audience learns about the isolation of an abusive relationship in a foreign country and the importance of community support.

Namrata, Shazia Javed, provided by the National Film Board of Canada

Selection Number 10: Roll Red Roll (2018)

This documentary by Nancy Schwartzman tackles the ubiquity and horror of rape culture in the U.S. by chronicling the Steubenville Ohio case – the notorious 2012 case of the high school sexual assault of a teenage girl by the star players of a Steubenville, Ohio, football team that became known internationally. The film, had its world premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival and documents the case in such a powerful fashion that your feelings of outrage will persist long after the movie is over.

Selection Number 11: Secret Superstar (2017)

This Bollywood drama is on the surface a whimsical tale of a schoolgirl whose biggest dream is to be a singing superstar. Underneath that is an exploration of how domestic violence, and patriarchal and societal norms, combined with an inability to break through the ceiling of a lower socio-economic class keep women and girls from getting an education and achieving their dreams, and perpetuate cycles of violence within families and societies. But it does also show how allies, both male and female, can help to break the cycle.

Selection Number 12: Slut Or Nut: Diary of a Rape Trial (2018)

Slut or Nut: The Diary of a Rape Trial is an Indiegogo crowdfunded documentary film which is an eye-opener about what happens in Canada when a victim reports their rape. The documentary goes through rape survivor Mandi Gray’s story as a device to walk the viewer through what it is like to report rape or sexual assault, do a rape kit, and stand as a witness in the trial of the assaulter. It also offers viewers who are victims and survivors useful information on alternate routes to find justice and comfort after a sexual assault. Director Kelly Showker is herself a sexual assault survivor.

Selection Number 13: The Apology (2016)

This documentary is about three former ‘comfort women’ who were among the 200,000 girls and women kidnapped and forced into sexual slavery by the Japanese Army during World War II. The film follows three women from South Korea, China and the Philippines, now in their twilight years, as they break decades of silence and tell about how their past shaped them and continues to impact their lives. Whether they are seeking a formal apology from the Japanese government or finding the courage to tell the truth to their families, the film depicts their incredible resolve to live as survivors.

Selection Number 14: The Testimony (2015)

In 2012, after the M23 rebellion drove the Congolese Army out of the eastern city of Goma, the retreating army systematically raped hundreds of civilian women in the town of Minova. This short documentary is about the Minova Trial, the largest rape tribunal in the Democratic Republic of Congo, and the fifty-six women who testified while being covered by a black veil to protect their identities.

Selection Number 15: Three Girls (2017)

This three-part BBC miniseries is a dramatised version of events surrounding the Rochdale child sex abuse ring that involved 9 men trafficking underage girls in England. The story is told from the viewpoint of three of the victims, showing how they were groomed and focusing on how the authorities failed to investigate allegations of rape because the victims were perceived as unreliable witnesses before lobbying by certain investigators resulted in the case being reopened and the eventual convictions of the perpetrators.

Selection Number 16: Veronica Mars (2004-2006)

A mainstay of the early 2000s, Veronica Mars is a noir mystery drama TV series about its eponymous teen private investigator. While Veronica solves various mysteries throughout the series, a main story arc is her investigating and dealing with the aftermath of her own drugging and rape at a high school party. While not physically strong like her predecessor Buffy, Veronica is whip-smart and powerful in other ways. Somewhat before its time, this series explores how she rises above being ostracised, mocked and not believed, to being a survivor and fighting for justice.

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All pictures used are Creative Commons images (from top to bottom):

16 Organisations and Resources for Indigenous Women Facing Gender-based Violence

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In 2017, the World Health Organisation stated that 1 in 3 women and girls worldwide has been subject to or threatened with gender-based violence which includes everything from femicide to domestic violence to female genital mutilation. This finding is expanded upon by a UN report released in November 2018 that found that the equivalent of 6 women are killed every hour, or 137 killed every day, by someone they know.

Given the high prevalence of violence against women (VAW) across the board, it is even more appalling that globally, Indigenous women face far higher rates of VAW than non-Indigenous women. Here are just three examples:

As Indigenous Peoples across the world face severe marginalisation and discrimination, which leaves them treated as second-class citizens and at high risk of violence and abuse, a wall of silence surrounds Indigenous women and girls who face everything from rape and domestic violence to femicide and forced sterilisation because wider society has historically swept these issues under the carpet. There is also usually very little to no help from local or national law enforcement agencies. Even within the anti-VAW movement, the plight of Indigenous women and girls has been overshadowed as the public focuses their attention to high profile cases that make mainstream media headlines. It is only recently, with the advent and proliferation of social media providing a global platform for Indigenous activists to raise awareness, that the wider world is slowly starting to wake up to and acknowledge the atrocities experienced by Indigenous women and girls.

While assistance from governments and global NGOs like the United Nations are slow in arriving (or, when it arrives, it is usually inadequate), there are many nonprofit organisations and resources that tirelessly work on projects, initiatives, and legislation that give Indigenous women the opportunity to voice out their concerns about VAW and other issues, as well as to get help to tackle or escape the violence.

In this article, we present 16 organisations and resources for Indigenous women and girls across Australasia, North America, and South/Central America. This is by no means a comprehensive list but we hope that it will be a useful starting point for anyone who needs help in their location, who wants to learn more about murdered and missing Indigenous women, or who wants to join efforts to end VAW against Indigenous women that are already underway.

It’s time to stop violence against women. Together.

Introduction by Regina Yau with additional content by Denishia Rajendran. List compiled by Regina Yau and written by Denishia Rajendran. Additional research by Denishia Rajendran and Bernardo Rosa Rodriguez.

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AUSTRALASIA

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #1: Far West Indigenous Family Violence Service – Australia

The Far West Indigenous Family Violence Service (FWIFVS) provides health care and transportation services to the Indigenous communities in rural Australia. Part of their services include providing confidential assistance to Indigenous families affected by family violence and advancing the awareness and education of domestic violence within the Indigenous communities. The FWIFVS also aids families struggling with domestic violence by providing support in their homes, at court, and for crisis payments and accommodation. The FWIFVS is auspiced by Cunnamulla Aboriginal Corporation for Health (CACH), which hosts various yearly community promotions to raise awareness and to end family violence and violence against women. One of the community promotions is  White Ribbon Day which is a male-led campaign held in conjunction with the 16 days activism to stop violence against women.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #2: National Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Women’s Alliance – Australia

The National Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Women’s Alliance (NATSIWA) aims to empower Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander women and encourages women to advocate for effective policy both domestically and internationally. Their vision is to protect the fundamental freedoms that are significant to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander women through cultural preservation, health education and coalition building. One of the key activities for their 12-month plan is to create a national plan to reduce violence against women. Essentially, NATSIWA seeks to encourage Indigenous women to raise their voices to protect their rights and eradicate the impacts of racism and stigma.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #3: North Queensland Domestic Violence Resource Service – Australia

North Queensland Domestic Violence Resource Service (NQDVRS) is a resource that is aimed at preventing domestic violence as well as assisting women involved in domestic violence. They provide various services to promote the safety of those involved in domestic and family violence. The resource works closely with the police and courts as well as other organisations such as The Women’s Centre (North Queensland Combined Women’s Services), Flora House and Sera’s Women’s Shelter to assist women affected by domestic violence. Similar to other organisations and resources, NQDVRS provides direct support services, community education and training of service providers. Most importantly, however, the organisation also addresses the root of domestic violence by facilitating a men’s behavioral change programme that challenges men to address their use of violence in their relationships. The programmme, known as Men TER (Men Towards Equal Relationships), runs in a group format where participants will gain the necessary tools and skills to change their values, beliefs and behaviors that are the foundation for their use of violence.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #4: Queensland Indigenous Family Violence Legal Service – Australia

Queensland Indigenous Family Violence Legal Service (QIFVLS) is an organisation that is committed to assisting Indigenous peoples who are victims of domestic violence, family violence and/or sexual assault by delivering culturally appropriate free legal support and community education services. They are located in Cairns, Townsville, Rockhampton, Mount Isa and Brisbane where they provide legal advice, court representation in the areas of law of family and domestic violence, child protection, family law, victim compensation and victim assist, sexual assault and minor civil law matters.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #5: Women’s Refuge – New Zealand

Women’s Refuge is an independent organisation designed especially to prevent and stop domestic violence that affects Māori women, Pasifika women, and migrant/refugee women. With 40 years of experience of working in the field of domestic violence, the organisation provides policy advice and advocacy on domestic violence and are regarded as experts on the subject of domestic violence. Women’s Refuge also works to raise awareness on the issue of domestic violence by staging public campaigns and providing expert comment to the media, and attending conferences and events such as the Parachute music festival offering information, workshops and seminars.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #6: WRISC Family Violence Support – Australia

WRISC is a resource that works with women and children in Indigenous communities to prevent violence of any kind, including family violence. Their Aboriginal Family Violence Program  engages with the Aboriginal and Torres Straits Islander communities to provide advocacy with services, court support and case management services. In fact, the resource works with youth perpetrators up to the age of 18 years.

NORTH AMERICA

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #7: Aboriginal Mother Centre Society – Canada

The Aboriginal Mother Centre Society (AMCS) is dedicated to moving mothers and children who are at risk of homelessness. The centre is fit with amenities suitable for mothers and children and further provides support and programmes for women and children, including transformational housing for Aboriginal mothers and children at risk, licensed daycare, family wellness, homelessness outreach and a community kitchen. The community kitchen and homelessness outreach programmes introduce job training opportunities for the local Aboriginal community members.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #8: Coalition to Stop Violence Against Native Women – United States of America

The Coalition to End Violence Against Native Women (CSVANW), based in New Mexico, was founded by three Native women. As a regional nonprofit coalition with a goal to eliminate violence against Native women and children, CSVANW mainly focuses on providing training, technical assistance, support and policy advocacy to the native and tribal communities. The coalition also sits on various tribal and statewide communities, task forces and groups as part of their policy advocacy programme. CSVANW has a book club where members of the coalition convene to discuss solution-based approaches that empower individuals and build relationships for stronger community response.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #9: Mending the Sacred Hoop – United States of America

An increased level of violence against women led to the existence of Mending the Sacred Hoop, an organisation that specialises in ending violence against Native women. They address various crimes against women such as issues of domestic and sexual violence, dating violence, sex trafficking and stalking in their communities. The organisation has formed a coalition known as Sacred Hoop Coalition serving all 11 tribal communities in Minnesota that is built towards providing training, technical assistance, and resources to tribal communities in Minnesota.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #10: Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women Database – United States of America and Canada

The Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women Database (MMIW Database) is a resource that focuses on creating an updated database for missing or murdered Indigenous women, girls and two-spirit people in Canada and the United States. Information in the database is frequently used by the media in helping to create public awareness and for research purposes. It has also provided data to advocates and policy makers, is used to address patterns of violence against Native Women, and allows community members to use the data when organising events to raise awareness on violence against Native women.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #11: Native Indigenous Women’s Resource Center – United States of America

Native Indigenous Women’s Resource Center (NIWRC) is a resource center with a mission to create and enhance the capacity of Native communities to end gender-based violence against Native women. To advance public awareness and policy development of gender-based violence against Native women across the nation, NIWRC hosts various projects such as Native Love, which educates Native youths on healthy relationships. They also host webinars on a wide range of topics to spread awareness on violence against Native women and work in partnership with the National Domestic Violence Hotline to establish and run the StrongHearts Native Helpline – a helpline that provides confidential service for Native American women involved in domestic and dating violence.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #12: Native Women’s Association of Canada – Canada

The Native Women’s Association of Canada (NWAC) is an organisation that helps to promote social, economic, cultural and political well-being of Indigenous women across Canada. NWAC’s policy developments encompasses a wide area of issues including violence prevention where they have hosted projects such as project PEACE and Sisters in Spirit to raise awareness of violence against Indigenous communities in Canada. Through their resources, they spread the awareness of gender-based violence within the Native communities.

SOUTH & CENTRAL AMERICA

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #13:  AGIMS Asociación Grupo Integral de Mujeres Sanjuaneras – Guatemala

AGIMS is an association that works to improve the living situations of Indigenous women in the municipality of San Juan Sacatepéquez in Guatemala. AGIMS’ Board of Directors carries out political advocacy before the local government as part of the Municipal Development Council. AGIMS also participates in a Consortium of Indigenous Women for Sexual and Reproductive Rights, which aims to to train, promote and demand compliance of the sexual and reproductive rights of Indigenous women. AGIMS works together with the different ancestral authorities of the communities by creating workshops that analyse and criticise the macho attitudes present in everyday life to build thoughts, ideologies, philosophies, attitudes and practices imposed by a patriarchal system, as well as to sensitise men at a personal level to the social, political, cultural and spiritual impact of violence at the community and national levels.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #14:  Casa de la Mujer Indígena de Tijuana, Baja California – Mexico

The Casa de la Mujer Indígena de Tijuana is an organisation that was formed by Indigenous migrant women in Mexico. They host a variety of workshops to educate and raise awareness on rights of Indigenous women and children in Tijuana, Mexico, and use their Facebook page as a tool to spread awareness by posting brochures and information on sexual and reproductive rights of Indigenous women, sexual violence against women and how to eradicate such violence, as well as advertising activities such as youth forums on teen pregnancy.

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #15: Núcleo de Proteção e Defesa dos Direitos da Mulher (NUDEM) da Defensoria Pública do Estado de Mato Grosso do Sul – Brazil

NUDEM is an official public network of support to women’s rights across the Mato Grosso do Sul state, which counts the second largest Indigenous population in Brazil. They provide legal guidance with an aim to promote and defend women’s rights in situations of gender violence with the integration of all Public Defenders. The centre has a psychosocial team that consists of a psychologist and a social worker who assist women in violent situations. The members of the centre make visits to villages to distribute booklets on the ““Maria da Penha” law, legislation that  was enforced to reduce domestic violence, to local Indigenous communities in Brazil. 

Indigenous Women’s Organisation/Resource #16: Women’s Justice Initiative – Guatemala

Women’s Justice Initiative (WJI) is a United Nations-sponsored programme to empower Guatemalan women to address inequality and gender-based violence with a focus on Indigenous populations. As the country has the 3rd highest rate of violent deaths among women in the world, this initiative adopts a community-based approach to raise awareness of gender-based violence within the Mayan community. WJI has also established a legal services programme to provide legal services to marginalised women on issues such as domestic violence. They also host other programs such as Women’s Rights Education Program, Adolescent Girls Program and Community Advocates Program, all of which aim to educate women and the Mayan community on gender-based violence.

The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Books About Violence Against Women

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Far from being merely a source of entertainment, storytelling frames reinforce and transmit culture and beliefs. More than that, stories have the power to fire the imagination and inspire new thoughts and ideas and thus to shape – or reshape – the perspective of individuals, communities and cultures about everything from tradition to gender.

In recognition of the power of storytelling to inspire change, The Pixel Project has put together our third annual selection of 16 books that depict violence against women and girls. Some of these stories are popular genre fiction while others are well-received non-fiction. Nevertheless, all of them will educate the reader in some way about gender-based violence, rape culture, sexism, and misogyny. The books and book series in this list have been selected from a wide range of genres including fantasy, crime/mystery, science fiction, and autobiography.

This year, our fiction selection are books led by female protagonists who have experienced VAW and whose stories show the aftermath of the violence on their lives and how they cope with it. For the first time, we also include a number of romance series and novels as acknowledgement of how romance has evolved to actively address issues of consent and violence against women.

Our non-fiction selection shows a common trend of depicting entrenched and pervasive violence against women and sexism in the diverse societies and worlds that they portray while offering threads of hope as people and characters fight for and maintain a world where women and girls are free from abuse.

This list is by no means complete as there are hundreds of books out there that deal with violence against women in its various forms. However, we hope that these 16 books and series will be a starting point for you, as they have for others over the years, to push for change in your community and culture.

Introduction by Anushia Kandasivam and Regina Yau; Written and compiled by Anushia Kandasivam and Regina Yau

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Book Selection #1: Asking for It (2016) by Louise O’Neill

Narrated by 18-year-old Emma O’Donovan, who was raped after a party, this novel explores how a person can become objectified in a world ruled by social media and where misogynistic rape culture is the norm. An unusual and visceral story in that the protagonist herself is unlikeable with unlikeable friends and it does not hold back on portraying how vile the online world can become, it skillfully chronicles the physical and psychological effects of being violated, feeling voiceless and descending into depression. It also asks important questions about rape culture, sexism and social media abuse.

Book Selection #2:​ A Thousand Splendid Suns (2008) by Khaled Hosseini

The second novel by Afghan-American author Khaled Hosseini after his debut The Kite Runner, this story is primarily about female relationships, set against a backdrop of a patriarchal society, domestic violence and war. The story follows Mariam and Laila, born a generation apart but brought together by circumstance that makes them both sisters and mother-daughter to each other. It tracks the strong bond they form as they struggle to live with an abusive husband and the ever-increasing danger and hardship of living in Kabul, and how the love, strength and self-sacrifice of women are often the key to survival.

Book Selection #3: Desert Flower (1998) by Waris Dirie and Catherine Miller

Born to a nomadic family in the Somali desert, Waris Dirie was subjected to female genital mutilation (FGM) at the age of five. This autobiography details her difficult childhood in a harsh land, where she had to contend with oppressive patriarchal norms and sexual abuse, to an arduous journey to London where she worked as a housemaid, and then her remarkable transformation into an internationally acclaimed fashion model and human rights ambassador. In her book, Dirie speaks openly about living with the effects of FGM and frankly about why the practice must be stopped. Experiencing the everyday life of a survivor through her own words makes this a worthy read.

Book Selection #4: I Am Vidya: A Transgender’s Journey (2013) by Living Smile Vidya

A compelling autobiography of a transgender woman’s journey to find and live her true identity, this book is also a unique insight into the duality of conservative Indian society and its rich cultural history. Vidya chronicles her journey from being born a boy, realising her true nature, being an outcast from her family and society, suffering the indignities and violence forced upon transgender people and her eventual claiming of her true self.

 

Book Selection #5: Lake Silence (2018) by Anne Bishop

In her latest book set in the bestselling urban fantasy series of The Others, Anne Bishop makes her lead protagonist Vicki DeVine, a divorced woman who left her abusive husband to carve out a new life for herself as the proprietor and caretaker of a rustic resort that she inherited via her divorce settlement. Bishop presents a nuanced, sensitive, and compassionate portrait of a survivor navigating through PTSD and other fallouts from her abusive marriage while also solving a murder mystery involving her abusive ex. Not your usual urban fantasy or mystery fare. And the best part? The abuser gets his comeuppance in the most satisfying way.

Book Selection #6: Mommy’s Black Eye (2009) by William George Bentrim, illustrated by Christi Schofield

Domestic violence exists everywhere. Often, children may not actually witness the violence but see the aftermath, such as their mother’s black eye. Aimed at younger children who have not been exposed to the topic of domestic violence before, this book glosses over some of the bigger issues of domestic violence but explains what it is and attempts to help them understand what is going on in their lives. It concludes open-ended with discussion of counselling and potential healing as a family.

Book Selection #7: Practical Magic (2003) by Alice Hoffman

Practical Magic is one of #1 New York Times bestselling author Alice Hoffman’s most famous (and cherished) books. The story centers around the Owens family of witches who have, for more than two hundred years, been blamed for everything that has gone wrong in their Massachusetts town. Even more insidious is the curse that an ancestor laid on them that decreed that no Owens woman would ever find true love… and if she did, that relationship would end with her lover’s death. Among other feminist themes, the book focuses on Sally and Gillian Owens who attempt to escape the Owens curse, but end up having to deal with Gillian’s malicious and abusive boyfriend. Hoffman handles the subject of domestic violence very deftly through the eyes of both sisters – showing Sally’s unwavering support of Gillian despite their differences and how both of them cope with the fallout from the abuser’s actions and accidental murder.

Books Selection #8: ​Rape: A Love Story (2004) by Joyce Carol Oates

Beginning with an account of the gang rape of female protagonist Teena Maguire, which left her near dead, and which was witnessed by her young daughter, this story is a condemnation of misogyny, skillfully tackled by author Joyce Carol Oates, who also wrote When We Were the Mulvaneys. Oates spares none of her characters – Teena is shown to be both good and flawed, there are no doubts about who the attackers are and they are named and described contemptuously. This is an extraordinary exploration of the aftermath and myriad consequences a horrible crime can have on individuals and whole communities.

Book Selection #9: Room (2011) by Emma Donoghue

This story is perhaps better known through the award-winning 2015 film adaptation, but the novel is well worth the read. Told through the eyes of curious, bright 5-year-old Jack as he explores the only world he knows – the tiny Room where he was born after his mother was imprisoned by the man who kidnapped her as a teenager – the story is really about how Jack and his mother cope with their captivity, slowly learn to live in the outside world again and deal with their trauma, how other people react to them, and the complex feelings of happiness and grief that they and their family go through.

Book Selection #10: Set The Night On Fire (2016) by Jennifer Bernard

Jennifer Bernard is a Romance author who is well-known for her books starring firemen as the lead male love interest. While this may lead many people to regard her books as typical wish-fulfillment fare for straight female readers, Bernard’s books are a cut above many others in the crowded field of Contemporary Romance because she is very adept at handling the issue of consent. In Set The Night On Fire, the first book in her Jupiter Point series, she handles the issue of rape and victim-blaming with insight and a strong message about believing victims and holding rapists accountable.

Book Selection #11: ​Simply Irresistible (2017) by Jill Shalvis

#1 New York Times bestselling contemporary romance author Jill Shalvis is renowned for her humour and ability to portray emotions authentically, particularly in her female characters, as they go through the ups and downs of building relationships with the men in their lives. In Simply Irresistible, the first book in her Lucky Harbour series, Shalvis takes on the issue of intimate partner violence and how its effects ripple through the lives of the protagonist, her sisters, and her love interest. Shalvis’ approach is less on-the-nose than many of the other selections in this list so it may be a good option for introducing the issue to a fellow romance reader who may not have thought about it previously.

Book Selection #12: The Alpha and Omega series (2008 – ) by Patricia Briggs

The Alpha and Omega series is Patricia Briggs’ spin-off companion series to her celebrated Mercy Thompson Urban Fantasy series. Anna Latham, the lead female protagonist, is a survivor of prolonged abuse (including rape) by the deranged and power-hungry alpha of a werewolf pack which tried to force her Omega wolf into servitude to them. In the first book of the series (Cry Wolf), we see Briggs very adroitly explore and show the psychological effects of rape and abuse on victims, the damage caused by bystanders who would rather turn a blind eye, and the monumental struggle that survivors face in learning to trust and relax around others.

Book Selection #13: The In Death series (1995 – ) by J.D. Robb

J.D. Robb is the pen name that #1 New York Times bestselling author Nora Roberts uses for her long-running and very popular near-future In Death series which features Lieutenant Eve Dallas and her criminal mastermind-turned-legitimate-business-tycoon husband Roarke. Eve survived vicious childhood sexual abuse by her father to go on to be one of the toughest officers in New York City and the go-to detective for difficult cases involving the full spectrum of crimes involving violence against women and children. Throughout this very long series, Robb/Roberts gives readers a clear and unflinching look at the lifelong effects of sexual abuse via Eve’s development as a character. The striking thing is that while Eve’s experience certainly drives her fight for justice, she does not let it rule her life and she does this with the help of her friends, co-workers, and husband – a clear message that it takes a village to help with the healing.

Book Selection #14:​ The Kitty Norville series (2005 – 2015) by Carrie Vaughn

New York Times bestselling Fantasy author Carrie Vaughn is best-known for her Kitty Norville series featuring the rise of Kitty Norville, a female werewolf and late-night radio talk show host for the supernatural, from an abused subordinate to a major power in her own right. The entire first book in the series (Kitty and The Midnight Hour) is a searing depiction of domestic abuse including coercive control tactics that the corrupt Alpha male of Kitty’s pack uses on her and other females – essentially dictating their lives as well as raping them when he feels like it. As the series progresses, Kitty goes on to leave the pack, try to help another subordinate female wolf leave, and eventually wrest control of the pack from him. Also notable is Kitty’s eventual choice of romantic partner, which sees her essentially opt to have a healthy relationship based on mutual respect and equality.

Book Selection #15: The Night Child (2018) by Anna Quinn

A psychological tale about a school teacher who starts seeing terrifying visions of a child, The Night Child starts as something of a thriller but as protagonist Nora Brown seeks medical help, she soon discovers that the apparition may be related to repressed childhood trauma. A debut novel by Anna Quinn, this story examines how the impact of childhood trauma lasts into adulthood. As a lot of the story unfolds in the therapist’s office, the fragility and strength of the mind and the importance of mental health for survivors is a strong theme. This novel may be emotionally challenging to read but it does offer hope in the form of the protagonist’s resilience and determination to save herself.

Book Selection #16: When I Hit You or, A Portrait of the Author as a Young Wife (2018) by Meena Kandasamy

Based on the author’s own experience of marriage, this first-person narrative tells the story of a newly-wed writer experiencing rapid social isolation and extreme violence at her husband’s hands. The narrator, a middle-class and educated Tamil woman, points out that she does not experience stereotypical Indian dramas of oppression but rather the villain is an educated and cultured man she married for love. A gripping and scathing exploration of insidious abuse, gender and societal expectations, and perpetuated toxic masculinity, it is also a story of a woman refusing to be silenced.

 

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The top picture is a Creative Commons image :

Book Cover Credits 

  1. Asking For It – From “Asking For It” (Goodreads)
  2. A Thousand Splendid Suns – From “A Thousand Splendid Suns” (Goodreads)
  3. Desert Flower – From “Desert Flower” (Goodreads)
  4. I Am Vidya: A Transgender’s Journey – From “I Am Vidya: A Transgender’s Journey” (Goodreads)
  5. Lake Silence – Courtesy of Ace, an imprint of Penguin Random House
  6. Mommy’s Black Eye – From “Mommy’s Black Eye” (Goodreads)
  7. Practical Magic – Courtesy of Berkley, an imprint of Penguin Random House
  8. Rape: A Love Story – From “Rape: A Love Story” (Amazon.com)
  9. Room – From “Room” (Amazon.com)
  10. Set The Night On Fire – From jenniferbernard.net
  11. Simply Irresistible – From “Simply Irresistible” (Goodreads)
  12. Cry Wolf – Courtesy of Ace, an imprint of Penguin Random House
  13. Naked in Death – From “Naked In Death” (Amazon.co.uk)
  14. Kitty Saves The World – Courtesy of Carrie Vaughn
  15. The Night Child – From “The Night Child” (Goodreads)
  16. When I Hit You or, A Portrait of the Author as a Young Wife – From “When I Hit You” (Amazon)

The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Authors Saying NO To Violence Against Women

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Books can be dangerous. The best ones should be labelled: “This could change your life.” — Helen Exley

Violence against women (VAW) is a prevalent and entrenched part of countless societies around the world but it is still considered a taboo topic even, to a certain extent, in developed and first-world communities. Pop culture media, therefore is invaluable in raising awareness, and promoting and prompting advocacy against VAW, doing much to break the silence.

From Harper Lee’s To Kill A Mockingbird to J.K Rowling’s Harry Potter series to Malcolm Gladwell’s The Tipping Point, popular authors and their stories have been instrumental in planting ideas, triggering thoughtful water-cooler discussions, and providing food for thought for communities. And in the age of geek culture and social media, bestselling authors wield influence beyond just their books as they are able to directly communicate with their readers and fans via Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and other social media channels.

The Pixel Project’s Read For Pixels campaign was first launched in September 2014 in recognition of the longstanding power of books to shape cultural ideas and influence the direction of history. Since then, the campaign has gone from strength to strength. To date, over 100 award-winning bestselling authors from genres as diverse as Science Fiction, Fantasy, Crime, Thrillers, Mystery, Chick Lit, Romance and Horror have participated in various Read For Pixels campaigns and initiatives, raising more than $58,000 for the cause to end VAW to date.

In this article, we honour 16 award-winning bestselling authors from our 2017 and 2018 Read For Pixels campaigns. They hail from many genres, including Comics, Horror, Contemporary Fiction, Young Adult, Urban Fantasy and Science Fiction. Many of them are global celebrities with strong fan followings, all are well respected in their countries or genres. Some are up-and-coming stars who have decided to use their talents for good. It is the movement to end VAW that unites and inspires them and we hope that all of them will continue to work with the movement in years to come.

To learn more about each author and their books, click on the author’s name.

To learn more about what each author has to say about violence against women, click on their quote to be taken to the YouTube video of their Read For Pixels Google Hangout or their blog articles.

Written and compiled by Regina Yau, with Google Hangout transcriptions by Bernardo Rosa Rodriguez, Denishia Rajendran, and Melissa Ruth Arul.

NOTE: 25 new authors participated this year and those not featured in this year’s list will be featured in next year’s list.

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Author Against VAW 1: Alafair Burke

Alafair Burke is the New York Times bestselling author of eleven novels, including the standalone thrillers The Ex, Long Gone and If You Were Here, and the Ellie Hatcher series: All Day and a Night, Never Tell, 212, Angel’s Tip, and Dead Connection. She is also the co-author of the Under Suspicion series with Mary Higgins Clark. A former prosecutor, she is now a professor of criminal law and lives in Manhattan. When talking about the failure of the justice system to effectively address VAW, she said: “I have very conflicted ideas about this because what I want to say is that the system needs to listen more. Women know when they are in danger. The system should listen to them when they say ‘for you to prosecute this case is going to put me in danger or for me to get a restraining order is going to make things worse’. It’s an odd analogy to make but sometimes you know the way to get your job done is to smile and keep your head down. And sometimes somebody knows if ‘I get a restraining order or I sign that complaint, it’s going to be worse’ and the system needs to take that into account. The problem is when the system used to take that into account, women would get pressured not to prosecute and to not get a restraining order and the police would not respond and they would just treat it as a purely private matter.”

Authors Against VAW 2: Ann Aguirre

Ann Aguirre is a New York Times & USA Today bestselling author; before she began writing full time, she was a clown, a clerk, a voice actress, and a saviour of stray kittens. She lives in sunny Mexico with her husband, children, and various pets. She writes all kinds of genre fiction for adults and teens. Ann is very outspoken about ending VAW and when talking about the role of parents in helping get rid of toxic masculinity and male violence, she said: “I think the most important thing is shifting the focus of rape culture because up till now it’s been teaching girls how to avoid getting raped and that is so backward. I mean when you think about it, you’re telling your ten-year-old that if anyone touches you inappropriately this is what you should do and don’t be afraid […] But really we should be having conversations with our sons and telling them that no matter how pretty you think she is, you absolutely do not have the right to touch her without permission. And you do not have the right to get angry if she doesn’t like you or she doesn’t respond when you flirt with her. What we need to be doing is educating our boys so as to eradicate the cult of toxic masculinity. I think it is terrible that little girls grow up in fear and boys are almost given a free pass.”

Authors Against VAW 3: Beth Cato

Nebula-nominated Beth Cato is the author of the Clockwork Dagger duology and the new Blood of Earth trilogy from Harper Voyager. Her newest novel is Call of Fire. She’s a Hanford, California native transplanted to the Arizona desert, where she lives with her husband and son. When Beth joined the Read For Pixels campaign in 2018, she said: “I support The Pixel Project because this is a very personal topic. I’m a woman. I’m friends with many other women and I hate that we are still at a point where this still exists. I read many historical books as part of my research and I think “oh my goodness 100 years ago why did we treat people like that?” and think “at least 100 years have passed and we’ve evolved past that”. And then I go on Twitter and go “things haven’t changed”. Women are still abused and constrained. And it needs to stop. As an author I feel the responsibility to be part of that change and to write about women who are strong, and not in the stereotypical way.”

Authors Against VAW 4: Brandon Sanderson

Brandon Sanderson’s novels include the Mistborn books, The Stormlight Archive — which includes his most recent instant bestseller Oathbringer — The Rithmatist and Steelheart, among others. He completed the final volumes of Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time series and is published in 35 languages. Brandon also teaches creative writing at Brigham Young University. Brandon had a lot to say about VAW and teaching boys and young men to respect women. When chatting about the latter, he pointed out: “When someone expresses their opinion and their emotions and the experience they’ve had, your response is not to say “no”. You can say “well my experience has been this” and that furthers the conversation. But to say “no, you’re wrong about your own experience”? I think that this is something that we all as a culture need to start teaching people to pay attention to.” He also unequivocally had this to say about using VAW as a trope in writing: “Using VAW specifically because they are women as a main plot in your stories is not just creating bad stereotypes, it is oftentimes lazy writing.”

Author Against VAW 5: Carrie Vaughn

Carrie Vaughn is the New York Time Bestselling author of more than twenty novels and over eighty short stories. She’s best known for the Kitty Norville urban fantasy series about a werewolf who hosts a talk radio advice show for supernatural beings — the series includes fourteen novels and a collection of short stories — and the superhero novels in the Golden Age saga. She has been nominated for a Hugo Award, various RT Reviewer Choice Awards — winning for Best First Mystery for Kitty and The Midnight Hour — and won the 2011 WSFA Small Press award for best short story for Amaryllis. Carrie joined the Read For Pixels campaign in March 2018 to speak out about violence against women. She said: “I think so much of the issue is raising awareness. If people don’t know that the issue is there, it’s an easy topic to ignore. It’s easy to think that we’ve already overcome this and it’s not our problem. [We can change things by] talking about it and raising awareness that this is a thing that happens and that this is something that we need to change… and providing tools ford how to stop it, and specially how to prevent it, I think that’s going to be the thing as well.”

Authors Against VAW 6: Dana Cameron

Whether writing SF/F/H, noir, historical fiction, thriller, or traditional mystery, Dana Cameron draws from her expertise in archaeology. Her work has won multiple Agatha, Anthony and Macavity Awards and earned an Edgar Award nomination. Her Emma Fielding mysteries was optioned by Muse Entertainment; Site Unseen debuted in 2017 (Hallmark Movies & Mysteries Channel). When chatting with The Pixel Project about stopping violence against women, Dana said: “Even when violence against women is not legal or not upheld by society and religious practices, it can still happen and it’s often hidden. And I think that the more we speak out about it, as women, as writers, as creative people, the more we can expose it. Because when women thrive, families do better and when families do better, the communities are stronger. And it’s such a simple mathematical thing. If you’re able to curtail and eventually stop violence against women, it’s going to make the whole world better, it’s going to make the communities better and it’s just going to feed off from that. By using the voices we have, as writers, as public people, to bring it to people’s attention, that’s the best way we have to start the conversation that will change things.”

Authors Against VAW 7: David D. Levine

David D. Levine is the author of Andre Norton Award winning novel Arabella of Mars (Tor 2016), sequel Arabella and the Battle of Venus (Tor 2017), and over fifty SF and fantasy stories. His story Tk’Tk’Tk won a Hugo, and he has been shortlisted for awards including the Hugo, Nebula, Campbell, and Sturgeon. His Stories have appeared in Asimov’s Science Fiction Analog Science Fiction, F&SF, Tor.com, numerous Year’s Best anthologies, and his own award-winning collection Space Magic. When discussing the issue of consent with The Pixel Project, David said: “As a society we have a done a terrible job of educating our young about consent. Only within the past 5-10 years have we really started talking especially to young men about what consent really means. It isn’t this legalistic thing of having to get a signed release before you can kiss someone. […] If everybody involved in a sexual situation is a truly willing participant who goes in with their eyes open and doesn’t do anything he or she doesn’t want to, it’s a lot sexier and a lot more fun. I wish we could go back and unteach all the terrible lessons that all of us have learned.”

Author Against VAW 8: Fonda Lee

Fonda Lee is the author of Jade City, which was a Nebula Award Finalist and named a Best Book of 2017 by NPR, Barnes & Noble, Syfy Wire, and others. Her award-winning young adult science fiction novels include Zeroboxer, Exo and Cross Fire. Fonda is a recovering corporate strategist, black belt martial artist, and an action movie aficionado living in Portland, Oregon. When chatting to The Pixel Project about how parents can help stop VAW, Fonda said: “I run into this a lot: YA books that can’t go through the school market because they have sexual content because there are definitely parents who would rather just shelter kids from all mention of sex altogether and that doesn’t do anyone any favours because the reality is kids are online these days and they can have access to anything. So I’ve heard teachers say that they have situations where no one talks to young men about sexual consent and their education is basically looking up porn on the internet which is like a completely unrealistic and wrong way to learn about anything. The fact that kids have so much access to stuff online these days, they’re going to find out, they hear from their friends, they find it online, and parents kind of have to get in ahead of that and be willing to have those conversations.”

Authors Against VAW 9: Jay Kristoff

Jay Kristoff is a #1 international, New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of LIFEL1K3, The Nevernight Chronicles and The Illunimae Files. He is the winner of five Aurealis Awards, an ABIA, has over half a million books in print and is published in over thirty-five countries, most of which he has never visited. He is as surprised about all of this as you are. He is 6’7 and has approximately 12,000 days to live. When talking about toxic masculinity and male violence, Jay said: “Violence is the last refuge of cowardice. I was raised in a house where that kind of thinking, that kind of attitude was simply unacceptable. My father taught me that that was never okay. It’s an abhorrence. Violence of any sort it’s an abhorrence. Anything we can do to end any kind of violence against any kind of person is important. […] particularly a kind a violence that is so extraordinarily prevalent and has been normalised for so many years. […] Anything  I can do to lead by example, I will.”

Authors Against VAW 10: Kristen Britain

Kristen Britain is the author of the New York Times-bestselling Green Rider series. She lives in an adobe house in the high desert of the American Southwest beneath the big sky and among lizards, hummingbirds and tumbleweeds. When asked about why she supports efforts to stop VAW, she said: “Fifty percent of the people of this planet are female and they need to be treated as human beings and that it would be a great start if the other half would treat the female population as human beings and… as human beings, women should be entitled to live without fear so they can excel the best they can and contribute to society. Because females should be able to walk down the street without being harassed. They should be able to fulfill a career without being confronted with misogyny.”

Authors Against VAW 11: Lynn Flewelling

Once upon a time in the magical wilds of Maine there was a little girl — who would someday be known as Lynn Flewelling — who would not, could not stop pretending. When she grew up she pretended her way into the Nightrunner series and The Tamír Triad, and all was well. Lynn’s work appears in a dozen languages. Born in northern Maine, Lynn is happily transplanted in Redlands, California, with her husband and too many animals. Lynn chatted to The Pixel Project in March 2018 about gender equality and its role in eradicating violence against women. She said: “Those with power don’t want to relinquish that power. They may recognise you as an equal but they will still want all the toys. So I think the fight continues. But I think gender equity would go a long way to help with that. But I think women to be treated as equals would mean there was an evolution of consciousness going on in the patriarchy and so that change has to start there.”

Authors Against VAW 12: Marie Brennan

Marie Brennan is the World Fantasy and Hugo Award-nominated author of several fantasy series, including the Memoirs of Lady Trent, the Onyx Court, the Wilders series, the Doppelganger duology, and the Varekai novellas, as well as more than fifty short stories. During her Read For Pixels Google Hangout, Marie said: “People hurting other people its not a good thing. We would all be happier if we were never subjected to it. But that change can’t work if we pretend that its being done equally in all corners and to all people because then we’re not actually looking at what’s in front of us. So we want to stop violence against women because it is disproportionately directed at women and women are disproportionately not supported when they are the victims of it. We need to focus on that because that’s the place where we can really make a big difference and push toward a better society for everybody in the long run. But it starts with women.”

Authors Against VAW 13: Richard K. Morgan

Richard K. Morgan is the award-winning author of The Dark Defiles, The Cold Commands, The Steel Remains, Black Man, Woken Furies, Market Forces, Broken Angels, and Altered Carbon, a New York Times Notable Book that won the Philip K. Dick Award in 2003. Altered Carbon is now a Netflix series. Market Forces was also optioned and won the John W. Campbell Award in 2005. When chatting with The Pixel Project about women’s human rights and VAW, he observed: “I don’t get anti-feminism. There are a number of people who said it better than me but if you genuinely say that you are not a feminist then what it means is that you do not value the fact that women can vote, the fact that women have access to decent healthcare, the fact that women can get a job without the permission of their father or their husband, the fact that women can get divorced if they’re in a position of being brutalised and can still manage to live their lives, the fact that women can have a refuge from violence against them. All those things you’re basically saying: “I could live without that”. All those things are the gains of feminism at some time or other in the past. It’s feminism that has brought that along.”

Authors Against VAW 14: Sara Raasch

Sara Raasch has known she was destined for bookish things since the age of five, when her friends had a lemonade stand and she tagged along to sell her hand-drawn picture books too. Not much has changed since then — her friends still cock concerned eyebrows when she attempts to draw things and her enthusiasm for the written word still drives her to extreme measures. Her New York Times bestselling Snow Like Ashes trilogy is available now from HarperCollins. It does not feature her hand-drawn pictures. When talking about the role of parents in bringing up the next generation of boys to not be violent, she said: “I actually have a son so this is something I have thought a lot about. I’m going to raise him to be a decent human being since obviously the goal of every parent is to make sure their child does not become a terrible person. I think a lot of it is to make sure that he is aware of other people, aware of how other people feel. That what he does affects others, not just women but just other people in general.”

Authors Against VAW 15: Tananarive Due

Tananarive Due is an author, educator and screenwriter who has won an American Book Award, a British Fantasy Award and an NAACP Image Award. She teaches Afrofuturism and Black Horror at UCLA and in the creative writing MFA program at Antioch University Los Angeles. She has received a Lifetime Achievement Award in the Fine Arts from the Congressional Black Congress. In her Google Hangout with The Pixel Project, Tananarive said: “We’ve seen […] so many women and men but especially women recalling their stories of abuse their sexual abuse and sexual assault, it’s so clear that it has a lasting traumatic impact and that traumatic impact has an impact on our children. So even though we might not tell a child the details of something violent that happened to us, they know in our behaviour they know in our silences and in that way a stranger’s act or a bad partner’s act from generations ago can still be rolling down your family tree. […] We have to break ourselves out of the cycles of letting people get away with violence, letting men get away with violence, letting parents get away with violence. We just have to break out of these cycles because it has such a lasting damage.”

Authors Against VAW 16: Vicki Pettersson

Vicki Pettersson is a New York Times Bestselling author of the Signs of the Zodiac and Celestial Blues paranormal series, and the straight psychological thriller, Swerve. She has a passion for writing women who defy the odds, who refuse to be silenced or stopped, and who won’t be written off. When asked why she supports the cause to end violence against women, she said: “I’m a chick and I’m gonna be a chick for a long time. I would like to move around the world in a safe way. I don’t know about anybody else but I’m tired of the alternative – it’s dirty and it’s unacceptable […]” She also said that authors should approach the topic of VAW “head on […] talk about it overtly. This is not something that should be hidden. It’s a problem and so we should address it.”

 

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Photo Credits

  1. Alafair Burke – Courtesy of Alafair Burke; Photographer: Deborah Kopaken Kogan
  2. Ann Aguirre – Courtesy of Ann Aguirre
  3. Beth Cato – Courtesy of Beth Cato; Photographer: Corey Ralston Photography
  4. Brandon Sanderson – Courtesy of Brandon Sanderson
  5. Carrie Vaughn – Courtesy of Carrie Vaughn
  6. Dana Cameron – Courtesy of Dana Cameron
  7. David D. Levine – Courtesy of David D. Levine; Photographer: John Scalzi
  8. Fonda Lee – Courtesy of Fonda Lee
  9. Jay Kristoff – Courtesy of Jay Kristoff; Photographer: Christopher Tovo
  10. Kristen Britain – Courtesy of Kristen Britain; Photographer: Diana Whiting
  11. Lynn Flewelling – Courtesy of Lynn Flewelling
  12. Marie Brennan – Courtesy of Marie Brennan
  13. Richard K. Morgan – Courtesy of Richard K. Morgan
  14. Sara Raasch – Courtesy of Sara Raasch
  15. Tananarive Due – Courtesy of Tananarive Due
  16. Vicki Pettersson – Courtesy of Vicki Pettersson; Photographer: Jeferson Applegate

16 Ways to Stay Safe When You Can’t Leave An Abusive Relationship Yet

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One of the most notorious misconceptions about domestic violence is encapsulated in the inevitable question that bystanders and victim-blamers often ask victims: “Why didn’t you leave?”

Leaving an abusive relationship is an extremely difficult and fraught process for many women for many reasons, some of which include: if they have dependents (children and pets); if they lack the financial resources; and if their isolation by their abuser is so absolute that they are almost completely cut off from family, friends, and community. Domestic violence advocates have also repeatedly pointed out that victims are most at risk of being killed when they are trying to leave. Add that to the tendency of many cultures and communities to victim-blame women who leave their husbands, the idea of escaping an abusive relationship becomes a remote prospect at best.

While staying in an abusive relationship seems counter-intuitive and self-destructive to those on the outside, a victim must be ready to leave before she will do so and there’s nothing anyone can do to change that. All friends, family, and communities can do is to hope that that she will be ready to leave before the violence maims her or takes her life.

This starter list offers 16 ideas to help keep a woman as safe as possible if she isn’t ready to leave or while she is getting an escape plan together. While not all of the suggestions in this article are applicable to every domestic abuse victim and her situation, we hope that this will be a useful starting point. If you have any other suggestions and tips, please do share them in the comments section.

Written by Regina Yau.

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Tip For Staying Safe #1: Get Informed About Your Situation

Domestic violence is complicated and many victims may not even realise that they are in an abusive relationship. They are unaware of red flag behaviour exhibited by their spouse/partner simply because their abuser may not use physical violence against them. If you suspect that you are being abused or if someone to whom you have mentioned your spouse/partner’s behaviour points out that such behaviour is abusive, start getting informed about domestic violence – how to track the patterns in your relationship to recognise abusive and controlling behaviour. At the very least, knowing what gaslighting means, for example, would confirm that you’re not crazy – he is. Then start recording it all as best you can.

Tip For Staying Safe #2: Protect Your Self Mentally and Psychologically

Not every domestic violence victim experiences physical violence but virtually all victims will experience psychological, mental, and emotional abuse including (and not limited to) gaslighting, belittling, and verbal threats. This wears down at your self-worth by creating insecurity and fear – ideal conditions in a victim for coercive control. One of your first steps in protecting yourself is to develop simple ways of reminding yourself of who you are and your worth so you can eventually gather enough inner strength to leave. It could be telling yourself daily that you are a worthy human being or (if you are able to) going to the library to read your favourite books when your abuser is at work or secretly continuing with a hobby that you may have given up when he came into your life. Take back your own self bit by bit.

Tip For Staying Safe #3: Cover Your Digital Tracks

If you are allowed internet access at home or can have it at work or via your phone’s data package, be sure to be careful to cover your tracks whether you are doing research about your situation, looking up help (e.g. visiting a domestic violence organisation’s website), or searching for information for items and services you’ll need in your escape plan. The most basic include:

  • Clearing your browser history on your computer at the end of every session.
  • Clearing your phone or tablet’s browser history at the end of every session. If you use an Android device, go here for tips. If you use an iPhone, go here for tips.
  • If you visit the website of a domestic violence organisation, be sure to familiarise yourself with where their safety button is – this is an icon that you can click which will immediately take you to an innocuous website in case your abuser ambushes you.

Tip For Staying Safe #4: Use The Right Apps

If you have a smart phone, consider downloading a safety app for women which has been designed to help victims in various ways ranging from automatically alert your support network if you are in danger to helping you find shelter should you have to leave in a hurry and have nowhere to go. Virtually all of them are free and most are compatible with both iPhones and Android phones. However, if you are a parent, do NOT download apps that allows you to track your children as abusers have been known to use these apps to track their victim’s movements.

Tip For Staying Safe #5: Keep Help on Speed-Dial… and Stealthy

If you have a mobile/cell phone, make sure to put the following numbers of speed-dial/in your address book:

  • The national domestic violence helpline (if your country has it)
  • The local domestic violence shelter helpline
  • The local police helpline number
  • The number of a close friend, co-worker or family member who would be willing to come get you when you decide to leave or to intervene when the abuse escalates.

As abusers frequently monitor their victims’ technology usage, list those numbers under innocuous names such as “hairdresser”, “bank”, “Boss’ Back-up Number”.

For those who fear that their phone may be taken away from them, memorise all important numbers.

Tip For Staying Safe #6: Keep Your Phone on You at All Times

Also remember to keep it fully charged at all times. You will never know when a situation will erupt, so it is crucial to have it on hand, especially if you recognise the signs of escalation leading to another episode of physical abuse. If you can, keep a cheap, spare, burner phone hidden as your back-up in case your abuser takes away from main phone. Have all important numbers programmed into it and make sure that it is fully charged. Check it from time to time to ensure that it works.

Tip For Staying Safe #7: Identify Your Allies and Get Back-Up

Even if you think that no one would ever believe you about your abuse, much less give you support, there is almost always at least one friend, family member, co-worker, service provider, or neighbour who has noticed (and recognised) the signs and is waiting for you to finally ask for help. Find out who that person is and ask them for support and intervention should a situation turn violent. Depending on your ally, their support could range from calling 999/911 for you to being on standby to come get you to providing you with a temporary place to stay. This option may not be available for all victims/survivors but it would be a feasible one for many.

Tip For Staying Safe #8: Have a ‘Safe’ Word/Phrase

In violent or emergency situations, you may not be able to text or say much. Have an agreed ‘safe’ word or phrase with your close friend/co-worker or family member who agrees to have their phone on standby to receive any emergency calls/texts. Keep it short and simple.

Tip For Staying Safe #9: Call Your Local Domestic Violence Hotline

Even if you are not ready to leave, find out the number of your local domestic violence organisation and call them to talk about your situation from time to time. Three (3) good reasons to do this:

  • If you need help identifying whether you are suffering from domestic violence, they can help you do that.
  • If you need someone to listen to you after another bout of abuse, most helplines are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
  • Calling them will get you on their radar and they will be able to act more quickly when you finally call them for help with escaping or seeking temporary shelter.

If you can, make that call using a phone your abuser is not aware of using a prepaid phone card.

Tip For Staying Safe #10: Map Your Escape Routes

Check out all possible escape routes in your house or apartment. Better yet, take time to set up a plan of escape including the numbers of people willing to help you get away if worse comes to worst. If there is a good chance that your abuser will be away from home at some point, it may be your chance to escape with your kids and/or pets should you decide to do so.

Tip For Staying Safe #11: Identify “Safe Zones”

While your abuser is at work or away, take a bit time to mentally list out the safest spaces in your home. These would be rooms where no weapons or potential weapons are kept including guns and knives and these “safe zones” would also be as far away from rooms like kitchens and the garage where weapons are available. There should also a physical escape route via a door or a window that can be opened and climbed out (this applies to ground/first floor rooms). The door should be lockable from the inside in case you need to keep your abuser out.

Tip For Staying Safe #12: Practice, Practice, Practice

When your abuser is not at home, start practising getting out of your house/apartment and getting to your “safety zones”. If you have kids and pets, get them to practise too so all of you will know what to do when the time comes for you to escape. If you have younger kids who can already talk, play it like a game. If you have older kids, impress on them the importance of keep this all a secret. If you feel that you cannot run the risk of your kids accidentally telling your abuser about the practice sessions, then practice alone while they are at school so that you can shepherd them through the routes when the time comes.

Tip For Staying Safe #13: Pack A “Leaving Bag”

Yes, you aren’t ready to leave yet but it doesn’t hurt to pack a “Leaving Bag” – basically a small sports bag or suitcase with a couple of changes of clothes for you (and your kids if you have them), spare burner phone, driver’s license, passport, birth certificates, medication for chronic health conditions, toiletries, and other small essentials. This bag should be small and, after packing, light enough for you to move quickly. Check out this page for a more comprehensive list of what to pack.

Tip For Staying Safe #14: Save Some Emergency Cash

Abusers often financially control their victims in various ways including refusing to let them have a job and/or bank account and controlling the household expenses. If this is happening to you, work on hiding away whatever cash you can, preferably in the emergency “leaving bag” that you’ve packed to just up and go when you’re finally ready to leave. Having some cash means you can pay for travel and temporary accommodation at the very least. If you trust a family member or friend to keep funds for you, you can also stash some cash with them.

Tip For Staying Safe #15: Create Plausible Reasons For Leaving The House

Figure out reasons for leaving the house at different times of the day and night that your abuser will accept. For example: Leaving the house at 8.00pm for a grocery run or heading out at 7am for your morning run or taking the kids to a play-date at 11am on a Saturday. This way, if you need to leave while he is home, you can do so without him being too suspicious.

Tip For Staying Safe #16: Log Evidence

Documenting your abuse is extremely important, not just because it will help you realise that you are not in the wrong and neither are you going crazy, but also as evidence in case you need to show the police and the court. If possible, keep a journal of all violent incidences, noting dates, events and threats made. You can also start a file containing pictures you’ve taken of your bruises and wounds after beating, your medical records, and every incident of violence. Keep multiple copies of that file in different places (e.g. different thumb drives stashed in different places with different people).

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All pictures used are Creative Commons images (from top to bottom):

The Pixel Project Selection 2018: 16 Notable Facebook Pages by Anti-Violence Against Women Organisations

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Since its founding 14 years ago, Facebook has become a social media powerhouse with over 2.23 billion monthly active users as of June 30th 2018. Facebook has grown from a basic social connection website for college students to a life platform. It is used to find, connect, and catch up with friends, to read the news, to conduct business, to shop, and to learn.

Facebook is also used to find causes, organisations, and events that are important to us and to advocate for various issues. Now Facebook users can learn about and support global issues from their own homes. Violence against women (VAW) is one of the global human rights issues finding supporters on Facebook. Now a story about VAW can be read, watched, or heard via Facebook by millions of people around the globe. They can follow organisational news, participate in grassroots campaigns, and donate right from their mobile phone or computer.

More importantly, more than 2 billion Facebook members worldwide can now locate anti-VAW organisations’ Facebook pages to learn about VAW or quietly get VAW victims and survivors the help they need should they be unable to speak on the phone or otherwise physically get help. Every little bit counts!

This is our seventh annual list of 16 recommended Facebook pages which we have selected because of their unique approach to fight all kinds of VAW. To make it as representative as possible the selection covers a wide range on countries across different continents. So choose a couple to ‘like’, or better yet ‘like’ them all, get informed, and take action.

Introduction by Rebecca DeLuca and Regina Yau; Written by Regina Yau, Research and compilation by Rubina Singh with additional selections by Regina Yau.

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Recommended Facebook Page #1: Bedari – Pakistan

Bedari is a national non-governmental organisation in Pakistan working to promote and protect the human rights of women and children. The organisation established Pakistan’s first crisis centre for women survivors of violence and, in the past 24 years, it has developed expertise on issues of gender empowerment, addressing violence against women and children, and processes of changing social and cultural attitudes in Pakistan. Bedari’s Facebook page carries a mix of updates about their own work, empowering stories of how women and girls are challenging patriarchy, and news headlines about violence against women in Pakistan and other Muslim-majority countries.

Recommended Facebook Page #2: Coalition for Sexual and Bodily Rights in Muslim Societies (CSBR) – Global

​The Coalition for Sexual & Bodily Rights in Muslim Societies (CSBR) is an award winning international solidarity network with 33 members’ organisations across 16 countries in MENA, SSEA and Central Asia. CSBR supports the integration of a holistic approach to sexual and bodily rights as human rights across Muslim societies–through feminist knowledge building, strategic convenings, and activist capacity-building. CBSR’s Facebook page actively posts a mixture of updates about the women’s human rights campaigns in Muslim countries, articles about gender-based violence that particularly affect Muslim societies such as child marriage, and news about feminist campaigns in Islamic nations.

Recommended Facebook Page #3: CREA – India

Based in New Delhi, India and founded in 2000, CREA is one of the few international women’s rights organisations that is based in the global South, led by Southern feminists, and works at the grassroots, national, regional, and international levels. They work with partners from a diverse range of human rights movements and networks to advance the rights of women and girls, and the sexual and reproductive freedoms of all people. CREA’s Facebook page is an excellent resource for anyone seeking to learn more about women’s rights movements in the Global South as they regularly post the latest news about feminist programs, campaigns, and advancements in India and other developing nations.

Recommended Facebook Page #4:​ Feminists United – Global

​Founded in 2012, Feminists United is a very popular feminist Facebook page that is “dedicated to fighting the war on women”. It is home to a huge community of 380,000 followers and their posts cover the whole range of feminist and women’s issues including violence against women and girls, sexism and misogyny in the workplace, racism experienced by women of colour, and LGBTQIA news. The page shares global stories with an emphasis on news from the U.S. and is an excellent resource for anyone interested in learning more about the latest hot button issues being tackled by feminists in the U.S. and around the world.

Recommended Facebook Page #5: Fiji Women’s Rights Movement – Fiji

Fiji Women’s Rights Movement (FWRM) was founded in 1986 by a group of 56 women from various backgrounds who took up the challenge of correcting the imbalances in women’s socio-economic and political status in Fiji. They were driven by the values of feminism, human rights, the rule of law, multi-culturalism, and good governance – the same principles that still guide FWRM as an organisation and a movement today. FWRM’s Facebook page is a great resource for anyone looking to learn more about the feminist movement in Fiji and the strategies they use to address violence against women, discrimination against women in the workplace, and the legislation of women’s human rights in government.

Recommended Facebook Page #6: Fundacja Feminoteka – Poland

Feminoteka is a Polish feminist NGO founded in 2005 which focuses on eradicating violence against women through running anti-violence projects for cities as well as for small towns, for schools and workplaces as well as providing a helpline for victims and survivors. Their Facebook page is run completely in Polish and shares news, articles, and other information about their programs, campaigns, and the women’s movement across Poland.

Recommended Facebook Page #7: How Revealing – India/Global

How Revealing is a website project founded by activist Urmila Pullat as a safe space for survivors to tell their stories. The website is an online repository of experiences of gender-based violence, and is working to contribute toward changing the narrative surrounding gender justice and sexual assault. Their Facebook page focuses on sharing the latest news on violence against women and LGBTQIA people in India and beyond, as well as articles and information about gender-based violence.

Recommended Facebook Page #8: Mending The Sacred Hoop – United States of America

Mending The Sacred Hoop is a nonprofit focused on addressing and eradicating violence against American India/Alaska Native women and girls in their home community of Duluth, MN and throughout the State of Minnesota. They also work with Tribes and Native communities nationally to tackle major forms of violence against women in their communities including domestic and sexual violence, dating violence, sex trafficking and stalking. Their Facebook page is an excellent resource for learning about violence against indigenous women across the U.S. as well as updates on various programmes, campaigns, and initiatives to eradicate the violence.

Recommended Facebook Page #9: National Sexual Violence Resource Center – United States of America

On their Facebook page, the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC) states: “NSVRC believes that through collaboration, prevention, and research-based resources, we are making the world safer, healthier and free of sexual violence and sexual assault. We envision a world where diversity is celebrated and all people are treated with dignity and respect and have full autonomy over their own bodies and sexual expression.” Their page is regularly updated with the latest breaking news about sexual assault and rape cases in the U.S., resource articles about helping survivors of sexual violence, and updates about their work and programs.

Recommended Facebook Page #10: No Means No Worldwide – Global

​No Means No Worldwide is an organisation committed to developing and implementing rape prevention educational programs for girls and boys. NMNW’s programs in Kenya have cut rape rates by 50% and reduced pregnancy-related school dropout by 46%. 74% of boys who took a NMNW class and witnessed sexual assault have successfully intervened to stop it. Their Facebook page is choc-a-bloc with information, news articles, videos, and op-eds about sexual violence prevention efforts and news worldwide – a useful resource for anyone interested in ideas for preventing sexual assault and rape in their communities.

Recommended Facebook Page #11: Resurj – Global

Resurj (Realizing Sexual and Reproductive Justice) is a membership-based alliance of feminist activists working across generations, constituencies, and identities seeking to realise sexual and reproductive justice for all. They are led by feminists from the Global South and work for the inclusion of diverse younger feminists in the movement. Their Facebook page shares news and thoughts about a range of sexual and reproductive issues including abortion, sexual assault, and women’s rights to participate in public spaces including politics in order to push for change.

 

Recommended Facebook Page #12: ​The A Project – Lebanon 

The A Project is a Lebanon-based organisation that creates platforms which reaffirm agency and autonomy in sexuality and mental health, while advancing a political discourse around sexual, reproductive, and mental health and seeking alternatives to counteract medical patriarchy’s restrictive and reductive approaches towards the bodies of women and gender non-conforming people in Lebanon. They also run a sexuality hotline for Lebanese people who wish to find out more about sexuality, gender, and reproductive health. Their Facebook page posts regularly about all these issues as well as updates about their programmes and campaigns.

Recommended Facebook Page #13: The Asian-Pacific Resource & Research Centre for Women (ARROW) – Malaysia/ Asia Pacific Region

​Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia-based ARROW was established to promote and defend women’s human rights in all aspects of their lives, especially their sexual and reproductive health and rights. They collaborate with national partners in many regional and global networks around the world, and are able to reach stakeholders in 120 countries. ARROW’s Facebook page documents their wide-ranging advocacy campaigns and work, as well as news about violence against women, women’s rights, and women’s reproductive health across the world.

Recommended Facebook Page #14: UK Says No More – United Kingdom

UK Says NO MORE is a campaign that seeks to unite the public and organisations in the UK to take a stand against domestic abuse and sexual violence under one powerful, visual symbol by providing open-source tools and resources for individuals and organisations to take action. Follow their Facebook page for updates and announcements about their various campaigns as well as general news about efforts to end violence against women around the UK.

Recommended Facebook Page #15:​ UN Women Africa – Africa

​UN Women Africa is a regional directorate of UN Women that implements programmes for gender equality and women’s human rights that are tailored to individual African countries, in close collaboration with governments, the UN system and civil society. Follow their Facebook page for all the latest news about women’s rights, gender, and development across the African continent, as well as updates and announcements about various UN Women programmes and initiatives to stop violence against women in various African nations.

Recommended Facebook Page #16: Women and Gender Equality Commission – Guyana

​The Women and Gender Equality Commission of Guyana’s mission is to “promote national recognition and acceptance that women’s rights are human rights, respect for gender equality and the protection, development and attainment of gender equality.” Their Facebook page contains a mix of posts and news about women’s human rights, reproductive rights, gender equality, and violence against women.

16 Ways Clinicians Can Advocate for Stopping Gender-based Violence in Their Communities

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The Pixel Project is pleased to welcome our 2nd guest “16 For 16” article from RANZCOG – the leading standards body responsible for the training and education of doctors in obstetrics and gynaecology in Australia and New Zealand. RANZCOG provides consultative leadership and advocacy in #WomensHealth to ensure excellence in #obstetrics and #gynaecology training.

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In Australia, doctors along with nurses and pharmacists are viewed as the most trusted professionals according to social research. This long standing community view supported by the relationship clinicians build with their patients creates a unique position of influence. What is really great about being a clinician who is interested in advocating for stopping gender-based violence is that it is likely that your voice carries weight in the community by the nature of your role. This means that there are lots of different ways that you can be a proactive advocate in your community.

As the old adage goes, ‘if you can’t change the situation, change your perspective’. While changed perspective is definitely the goal of prevention, assessing your views about gender-based violence is a really important and often undervalued step. In this article we outline 16 ways that clinicians can advocate for stopping gender-based violence in the communities where they live, work and socialise.

Written by Nastashjia Katu and Lisa Westhaven from RANZCOG.

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Start With Yourself

Recommendation #1: Self-Check – Asses Your Own Attitudes About Males and Females

Asking yourself whether you treat or view women and men differently because of their sex can be a confronting exercise but a good place to start. It may be that in some circumstances you may be contributing to, or uncomfortable in, calling out attitudes that condone Violence Against Women (VAW). Identifying these situations can be challenging for some people and Male Champions of Change have developed the We Set The Tone resource that highlights how everyday sexism contributes to attitudes that accept violence. While sexism is only one driver that condones violent attitudes, it is a useful tool to identify commonly experienced situations and how you might approach them.

Recommendation #2: Be Aware of the Underlying Social Conditions that Promote VAW

VAW is prevalent in all communities and is primarily driven by gender inequality, and reinforced by a number of other factors. When men and women do not have equal power, equal access to resources and opportunities, or their work, ideas and voices are not equally valued, an environment that fosters violence against women is maintained. Being aware of the drivers of violence enables clinicians to recognise or seek out the tools they need to respond appropriately in different situations.

Recommendation #3: Recognise the Gendered Nature of Violence against Women

There are characteristics of women’s experiences of violence that make it a distinctly gendered problem: Women are more likely to be victimised by men known to them while men are more likely to experience violence by other men; Women are also more likely to be physically assaulted in familiar spaces such as in their homes while men are more likely to be assaulted in public places. The rate of hospitalisation and death by intimate partner violence is also disparate and women are more likely than men to experience these consequences. Recognising that there are gender-specific dynamics when addressing VAW is crucial while advocating for and seeking appropriate solutions that address root issues.

Recommendation #4: Acknowledge that Attitudes that Condone VAW Exist in All Communities

VAW is a a global epidemic. It impacts all communities at all levels and in all spaces both public and private. There is no one community group, religious group or geographic area that either represents violence or is void from violence. When advocating for ending VAW it is important to lay aside any held biases and recognise that VAW will occur in any place where gender inequality exists.

Speaking Up and Using Your Voice

Recommendation #5: Communicate that Violence Against Women is Preventable

Ending VAW requires a cultural shift and a redressing of entrenched historical attitudes. Changing hearts and minds is long-term work and advocating for this change can be perceived as more achievable if the message of success is in the front of mind. This is why communicating that VAW as being preventable is so important. Responding to violence is important, and many clinicians will experience caring for women and their families in a response setting. However, eradicating VAW requires preventative work. Voicing this and knowing what actions challenge the drivers of violence is a meaningful way to advocate for women and their families. This community toolkit provides a practical framework for practitioners addressing VAW.

Recommendation #6: Get Comfortable with Speaking out about Things that are Sexist or Degrading to Women

Sexist language devalues and robs individuals of the respect they deserve. Getting comfortable speaking out in these situations may require some practice. The Line have produced a how-to guide on how to combat this behaviour. Some of the tips include: addressing the comment and not the person or using a ‘we’ statement to gain the support of people around you.

Recommendation #7: Challenge Gender Inequity in Everyday Experiences

Promoting gender equity is an action or response that can be applied in any setting. Challenging gender stereotypes is one way to break down negative attitudes. In situations where women are disrespected or unfairly treated because of their gender, calling the comment or behaviour out is a good way to prompt conversations. By simply questioning or asking for clarification about a behaviour or comment, it’s a strategy that flags the action as an issue while signalling to those around you that this behaviour is not okay.

Recommendation #8: Talk to the People in your Life about your Commitment to Ending Violence Against Women

Letting people know that you are committed to pursuing gender equity by supporting equal opportunities in your workplace, working with your community board to advocate for better-lit carparks, doing a fun run raise to raise awareness for VAW – any action really is a simple yet effective form of advocacy. However, taking action is sometimes not enough – to boost the signal for the message that VAW must end, you need to let other people know that you are doing something about it because sometimes, telling other people about it may be just the incentive they need to start doing something too.

Recommendation #9: Call Out Victim-Blaming

A report analysing young Australian attitudes towards VAW found that 1 in 5 young Australians believe that there are times when women can be blamed for sexual assault. The percentage of young people who believe when women say no they actually mean yes has risen from 13% in their parents’ generation to 20%. Making the message clear that Violence against Women is never acceptable, whether in a consulting situation, in the workplace or in the community is important.

What You Can Do in Your Workplace

Recommendation #10: Advocate for Accountability in Workplace or Member Organisations

For Obstetrics & Gynaecology (O&G) specialists in Australia and New Zealand, there are many opportunities through membership organisations like RANZCOG to engage with colleagues and other professionals in the field. Calling for membership organisations to have VAW as an issue that is present and visible on the agenda is a great way to advocate for prevention and highlight the issue. Calling for accountability and action on things like Family Violence Leave, equal representation of leadership and participation in awareness raising campaigns are good places to start. This webpage is an example of how RANZCOG is being active in this space.

Recommendation #11: Advocate for Workforce Training and Upskilling

Most local government councils in Australia will either deliver or have connections to a provider that can deliver workforce training in areas such as gender equity. If advocating for VAW is a relatively new area of focus (or an area with little focus), suggesting gender equity training or even connecting with organisations who deliver this training is a good start. The state of Victoria in Australia recently established a gender equality strategy and has links to organisations that specialise in workforce upskilling in this space.

Proactive Actions You Can Take.

Recommendation #12: Look for Opportunities to Keep Learning

Engaging with organisations who advocate for VAW as their core business is a good way to keep learning and connect with experts in the space. In Australia, Our Watch is the peak Prevention of Violence against Women (PVAW) body and there are a range of opportunities for members of the public to become to become in programs or events that are happening in their local areas. Our Watch also have a library of resources and links to partner organisations who have programs across the country.

Recommendation #13: Educate Yourself about the Warning Signs of Violence

Knowing what warning signs to look for in your personal relationships, but also in a patient situation will help you plan how you can help or respond. Abuse in most cases does not happen instantly and there are subtle signs to look out for, such as forced isolation from support networks, aggressive language and behaviour and excessive possessiveness of time and whereabouts. Read more about warning signs of abuse at this Safe Steps page.

Recommendation #14: Talk about Women or Female Colleagues who are Doing Great Things

A non-confrontational way to advocate for PVAW is to publically recognise women. Whether it is shouting out a friend for their work on social media, acknowledging their achievements in the workplace or raising awareness in the community; giving women equal airspace to be recognised is a step towards breaking down the barriers of gender inequality.

Recommendation #15: Recognise that Resistance is Inevitable

Any big change will always be met with resistance and being prepared for this is wise. Managing and dealing with backlash to gender equality initiatives can be confronting but there are resources and information available to help. Vic Health developed 13 steps to tackle gender discrimination.

Recommendation #16: Get your Friends, Colleagues and Family on Board

If you are committed to the PVAW, use your influence and get your networks on board too. There are lots of tips and resources in this article that provide a good starting point as to how you can be an advocate in your family, workplace and community. The most important thing to remember is you don’t have to do it alone. Find a group of people who are just as passionate as you (or get them there) and put some of these tips into action!

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All pictures used are Creative Commons images (from top to bottom):

16 Ways for Boys and Men to Take Action against Gender-based Violence in the Post-#MeToo World

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We are pleased to welcome a guest “16 For 16” article from our partner, Breakthrough – a global human rights organisation working to make violence and discrimination against women and girls unacceptable. Their cutting-edge multimedia campaigns, community mobilisation, agenda setting, and leadership training equip men and women worldwide to challenge the status quo and take bold action for the dignity, equality, and justice of all.

This year, Breakthrough India shares a list of 16 actions that men and boys can take against gender-based violence in the post-#MeToo world.

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Sexism and misogyny has existed for centuries and continues to survive. Even today, whenever there is a discussion about sexual harassment, we do not acknowledge the underlying mindsets that perpetuate discrimination and violence against women. Sexual harassment is still viewed as a perpetrator’s individual behavioural problem. In the wake of the global #MeToo movement, it was heartening to see how many women and men have found solidarity on social media while sharing their experiences of sexual harassment and assault, many of whom had never even either been able to process or acknowledge these ugly experiences.

Unsurprisingly, on the other side, there has been backlash in abundance, with arguments invariably veering into standard Whataboutery like “Why is she speaking out now?” and “Does she want publicity?” when women come forward. We have witnessed arguments that focused on the graveness of sexual violations as the only deciding factors rather than challenging certain existing norms that allow the society to NOT believe a woman’s account of sexual harassment. #MeToo signifies a historic global moment when men are finally put under the microscope for their internalised behaviour towards women and other genders. However, very few genuine voices of reflection and acknowledgement have come forward, and even fewer confessions.

A year later, as India grapples with our own #MeToo reckoning, we continue to search for solutions towards which are beyond asking cis-hetero men not to assault women, or not to tell sexist jokes. Yet all is not lost and while there is still a long way to go, it is now time to dig deeper by asking: What can men and boys do to stop perpetuating gender biases, toxic masculinity and internalised misogyny? We need to take the movement to communities and move it beyond conversations and translate them to actions.

For this year’s 16 Days Of Activism, we present to boys and men a 16-step plan for you to end violence against women (VAW) and create a culture of gender equality:

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Actions For Boys and Men #1: Be an ally without hesitation

To many boys and men, being an ally may seem daunting even though there is an urgent need for you to be an ally to the anti-VAW movement and to the women and girls around you. If you are a beginner, find other male allies and join the fight together. If you are already an ally, you know that the benefits of gender diversity and equity are many for not just women but also men. However, it’s time to move away from the narrative of self-gain and focus on the greater good that your contribution can bring. Also make sure you understand the fine line between being a true ally and appropriating women’s voices. Oftentimes, being a silent ally who stands behind and provides support is actually much more beneficial than trying to play the saviour.

Actions For Boys and Men #2: Call out gender-based discrimination and violence

Your silence on the issues of gender-based discrimination and violence makes you complicit. Recognise that your privilege allows you to call out sexism and blatant misogyny around you. So call out other men for the use of problematic violent language against women, children, minorities or in general (eg: “What a fucking bitch”, “Man we just got raped in today’s game”, “Fucking cunts” etc). Furthermore, when you see your friends making sexist jokes and comments, call them out. You will probably be labeled as “the guy who takes these things too seriously” but embarrassing as that is, use it as a teachable moment for yourself because women have always been shut down by this kind of rebuke when they speak out.

Actions For Boys and Men #3: Do not be a silent bystander

When you stay silent while witnessing any form of gender-based discrimination and violence, sexist behaviour and problematic narrative-building, know that your silence is only going to harm the person suffering from it. Bystander intervention has shown to be one of the most effective deterrents of VAW. Call on other bystanders to intervene together. Your voice and support will have an impact.

Actions For Boys and Men #4: Talk to your sons, brothers, nephews and younger friends

Cis-hetero men and their relationships with other men and boys are often infected with a lack of emotional openness. This is your time to start talking to your sons, your younger brothers, nephews, friends, cousins and colleagues. Take the lead with having difficult conversations around gender discrimination, sexual assault, coercion, consent, masculinities, and sexualities and link it back to personal experiences and behaviours. Understand that you control your own circle of influence and that you can create an impact on younger or more impressionable men and boys around you.

Actions For Boys and Men #5:  Listen to survivors of gender-based violence

LISTEN to people who are survivors of gender-based violence (and discrimination). Just as importantly, BELIEVE them. Listen to girls and women if they tell you about their sexual harassment. Recognise that women’s fears are valid and do not treat them as hysterical. Involuntary gaslighting is emotional and mental abuse, stay away from it. The main reason why the #MeToo movement was a landmark moment is because women’s (and men’s) voices were heard, acknowledged and also at some level, believed.

Actions For Boys and Men #6: Learn to read micro-behaviours and signs of distress

In the larger context of violence against women and girls, we end up talking about issues like assault AFTER the victim/survivor has taken the courage to share. Do not wait for it to come out this way. Learn to read micro-behaviours or how someone’s behaviour is changing around you. The key is to notice changes in body language, patterns like absenteeism or irregularity of any kind, physical health issues, sudden reclusiveness or anger. Do not ignore these or any other signs of distress that women may show but not necessarily share in as many words.

Actions For Boys and Men #7: Know that consent is complicated and make sure you have it

We now realise that consent isn’t a mere “yes” or “no” in any given situation. Think about the many situations where consent may be implied but you are not sure, since no two situations are the same. Stop. Think. Ask. Listen. Analyse. Consent is complicated like all human behaviour. Create an open space with your partner/s to be able to comfortably have a dialogue. Do not make assumptions on the other person’s behalf.

Actions For Boys and Men #8: Check your personal behaviour

In trying to create a gender equal society, it is also important to self-reflect on issues like class, caste, gender, race, sexuality, identity, power, and economic status. People’s identities intersect in any given situation. Recognise your own privilege and conditioned problematic behaviour like mansplaining, toxic masculinity, lack of consent, etc. This exercise will, more often than not, be painful for your ego but the idea is to become a person with whom women feel safe, heard, respected and valued as equals.

Actions For Boys and Men #9: JUST STOP SAYING #NOTALLMEN

This is a no-brainer. Yet this wretched hashtag and response fails to leave our social consciousness. Instead of getting defensive when you hear the phrase “all men” and retaliating with “not all men’”, shift your anger onto those men that have given all men a bad name. Call them out on their violent behaviour, and hold them accountable. Change the narrative – Not All Men use the hashtag #NotAllMen.

Actions For Boys and Men #10: Shun hypermasculine pop culture icons

When you ask a young boy ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ His response would usually be along the lines of a ‘tough macho man’. This is what young boys see and pick up from popular media – TV, movies, YouTube videos, music videos etc. Popular culture commonly throws up visuals of the buffed-up male body flashing big guns to create violent demigod-like role models that other men aspire to be. Eg: THE ENTIRE CAST OF THE FILM THE EXPENDABLES. Don’t buy into the pop culture’s idea of ‘might is right’. Rethink these icons, reexamine your own idols.

Actions For Boys and Men #11: Bid goodbye to victim-blaming

While it may seem cool, don’t judge women just because they ARE women. It does NOT matter what she was wearing, or where she was, or who she was with. Like all bad habits, cut out all victim-blaming from your life altogether. Even if she was prancing around buck naked in the middle of the street at midnight, she still wasn’t asking for it. We say this with complete confidence – NO WOMAN asks for violence. You don’t need research for this.

Actions For Boys and Men #12: Be prepared for some hard decisions

This is a tough one. If a woman approaches you regarding uncomfortable behaviour from other men who may be friends/compatriots/colleagues/family, do not immediately dismiss her or get defensive about the man’s intentions right away. Hear her out and then take action if necessary. Apply the same strategy even when boys or men seek your help in this way.

Actions For Boys and Men #13: Cut out toxic friendships and relationships from your own life

Let’s recognise that abusive relationships affect men’s mental health and life as well. These relationships come in different forms, from intimate partners to family and friends. Learn to pick up on signs of abuse in relationships and friendships that leave you mentally and emotionally drained. All forms of abuse are cyclical and this is how you can to break the chain.

Actions For Boys and Men #14: You are vulnerable, it’s okay to acknowledge it

To date, there has been limited conversation around the burdens of masculinity on men. Hypermasculinity in particular affects men’s emotional capacities as well as mental health because a man’s vulnerability is seen as a sign of weakness. This narrative needs to change. There needs to be a cultural push to address the fact that men are vulnerable and it is okay to show emotion. Cry, sing, dance, and express yourself in healthy ways to help bring about acceptance of newer ways for society to define its ‘desirable men’.

Actions For Boys and Men #15: Compassion and empathy aren’t ‘girlie’ things

First of all, there is nothing wrong in being associated with anything deemed ‘girlie’. Secondly, values like compassion, care, nurturing, and empathy are neither gender-specific nor do they have to be. Turn up your empathy levels and challenge the world to not view and treat different genders unequally. Apathy and indifference by men only add to the culture of violence. Challenge this silent kind of abuse by imbuing compassion into your everyday dealings with people.

Actions For Boys and Men #16: Know that it is a journey and you don’t have all the answers but do not stop

While we acknowledge that patriarchy affects men adversely, let’s also acknowledge that patriarchy benefits men in a multitude of ways, which in turn victimises other genders. It is, after all, a system created by men to benefit men. To date, patriarchy is very slowly being chipped away and it is important to remember that none of the progress made to date happened overnight. You may not have all the answers today but it is okay. The fight towards a gender inclusive world free of violence, discrimination and access for all is a journey. Use your male privilege for the cause because men need to be a part of the solution for everyone to prosper together.

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All pictures used are Creative Commons images (from top to bottom):